Ted Sabourin

Testimony of Edward Sabourin

          I was lost now I’m found; I was blind now I see. Now I finally understand the meaning of these words in this beautiful song.

          Like most of you, I was raised in a decent middle income Canadian family that went to church every Sunday but, other than that there was no prayer time nor discussion about God other than that which I received via our watered down Catholic education at school. I had no clue about whom or what God and our Lord Jesus were all about. So as I grew older my heart became colder towards God and turned towards the desires of the world. When I finally moved away to attend College, God was not a part of my life other then the Christmas and Easter rituals I would attend when visiting home. By this time I was experimenting with almost every form of entertainment or instantaneous pleasure the world could give me. I jumped into relationships with different girls; every time thinking at last I’ve found true love.

          When I started working and moved to Ottawa, I began to think that there must truly be more to life than these casual on/off relationships, which I was in. It was then that I fell head over heels for a woman that worked in the accounting department where I worked. I can remember having a dream seeing this young woman going up the elevator at work. When I awoke I prayed to God. Please God let me marry this woman. I really don’t remember why I called out to God, but he answered me. It wasn’t too long after that we were dating and I knew this was my soul mate.

          During our courtship, Joanne asked me if I would go to church with her and I agreed. We started going to mass and I even went to confession one day for the first time since my First Communion. I can’t actually remember having confessed all the immoral activities and things that I had done, because I still didn’t have that personal relationship to Christ.

          Less than 2 months later, I asked her to marry me and foolishly she agreed. She had no idea what she was doing. Thank God! A little over 8 months later we were married. As the years went by we continued to go to mass regularly. When asked, I kept telling others I was doing it for the children to instill good morals. At the time I couldn’t care less whether I went or not, because I never really got anything out of it. The homilies were dry and boring. The mass was long and had nothing to do with me, or so I thought anyway.  I was still far away from the Lord and leading a sinful and immoral lifestyle.                         

          That all changed for me somewhere around the year 1998 (can’t recall exactly). I read a book my in-laws gave to my wife. The book was on Medjugorje and how our Blessed Lady was appearing there to six children since the early eighties. Her messages were continuously imploring people to pray and submit their lives to her son Jesus. I must say at first I was quite a skeptic but nonetheless it taught me to think about sin and how much pain it caused our Lord and our Mother Mary. God was opening my heart and allowing my eyes to see what was going on in the world. I began to investigate reported apparitions, visionaries and prophecies. I was amazed at the sheer volume of reported visions, apparitions and inner locutions being received throughout the world. I got a little frightened at the prospect of meeting my Lord and Saviour in the state my soul was in. I invited God into my life and asked him to help me change. It was also around this time that my temporary work contract was ending and I would have to return back to my regular job; for I was on loan to another company. I realized that I couldn’t go back to my regular job if I was trying to amend my life. I prayed for a new job so that I could get away from all my current friends and influences, which would prevent or hinder the changes our Lord needed to make in me. God once again answered my prayers. I started a new job about one week before I was due to go back. The atmosphere in my new place of employment was perfect for the adjustments God was making in me.  

          It was also at this time my wife and I began to pray the rosary and say nightly prayers. Also, for the first time in my life I went and did a sincere confession of all my past immoral behaviors. Slowly Joanne and I turned our lives over to Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary. We made some serious changes in our lives and started renouncing the things of this world. We discovered the Christian music station (CHRI) and stopped listening to secular music. We stopped watching TV unless it was programming that would progress our faith. We started reading the lives of the saints and deepened our relationship with Jesus. We started playing more games with our children and teaching them the faith. For the first time in my life I had an inner peace. Our marriage came alive and suddenly all our problems no longer seemed insurmountable. Jesus and Mary brought joy and love into our family.

          During this time there were a few major traumas in our lives, which seem to propel our search for deeper meaning to Life. My Mother died and our six-week-old God Child died shortly after in the same year. As we turned to prayer in search of meaning or reason for these tragic events, the Lord was our sole consolation and comforter. We also stumbled upon a healing mass given by Fr. Clement Machado.  It was at that mass that the realization of the true presence of Jesus in the Eucharist hit home. What an incredible life-changing event that was for both Joanne and I. From that moment on I was more conscious of the reverence, love and devotion that Jesus deserved in the Eucharist.

          As I look back at all this and see how the Lord has worked in our lives, I see all the fruits of our faith, the changes in our children and our attitudes especially when were confronted with tragedies, trials and sufferings. I marvel in awe at how or why the Lord should rescue a sinner like me. I see now that God’s Commandments are not simply put there to rule over us as a dictator but they are created out of love for our protection and the means to achieve our salvation. Like a loving Father he wants only the best for His children and is heart broken at the loss of any soul. I am aware that there are still many aspects of my life, which need improvement. So I continue on my journey with the words of the Apostle St. Jude in my mind “Keep yourselves in the love of God, waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ, unto life everlasting.” (Jude: 1:21 J) Amen!

May God Bless You!

Sincerely, Ted Sabourin

Lise and the boys

Hi Kim!

This letter is long overdue.  My family and I are so very grateful to you and your network of friends.  Please share this letter with them.

I cannot even count the number of times I have reminded my boys how fortunate we are to have had the support of so many friends, family, strangers and new friends!  We are surrounded by reminders of the generosity that was bestowed upon us, from the towels we use, dishes we eat from or beds and linens we sleep on.

It has been an eventful year and I would like to take this opportunity to update you on what has happened.  The boys’ were ordered to be returned home to me on September 15, 2003.  Shortly thereafter, their father contacted the police and Children’s Aid Society with allegations that I was abusing the children.  The CAS immediately recognized the frivolous nature of the allegations and were very supportive of me.  They continue to be involved as they recognize the abusive nature of the father and to support me as he continues to make frivolous allegations against me.

Their father refused to allow the boys to attend counselling and threatened to sue the school board if they allowed any social workers to speak with the children.  Custody had not been ordered at this point so as he refused counselling the children could not receive it.  Meanwhile he continued to make allegations of abuse against me so I challenged him to let the children attend the counselling to deal with the abuse that he claimed that I subjected them to.  He continued to refuse this.

We had several court appearances throughout the process.  The family court judges readily recognized the father’s abusive nature and it was progressing well.  The Office of the Children’s Lawyer did a three-month investigation recommending sole custody to the mother, mental health therapy to the father and suggesting that thought should be given to supervised access for the father.  The settlement court judge advised that if she were the trial judge she would recommend sole custody to the mother and supervised access by the father.  I could not have hoped for better and went into the final trial with optimism.

Things took a terrible turn as we had a criminal judge for the final trial.  The judge appeared to buy the father’s performance as he gave testimony alleging abuse and neglect on my part.  At the end of the first day of trial, hearing only the father’s testimony, the judge proclaimed that he was “an extraordinary father” and he was going to get more access to the children and half of my house.  The father was caught in a number of his lies on the second day of trial.  We settled with sole custody of the children to me before the judge had an opportunity to hear testimony refuting the father’s story and proving his perjury.  The judge never did hear evidence of his lies so the father was left in a position of credibility and the judge ordered that he get half of my home.

The judge refused to address the property issue as we had a previous judge make an interim order on this issue.  The previous judge had made an order clearly stating that it was only an interim order to provide items to care for the children until we went to trial.  The order also stated that the final trial judge should deal with this but that did not happen.  The property that was ordered to be returned was the fridge, stove and freezer then minimal items such as spices, kitchen items, pillows, games, etc.  The father has failed to return my property despite the fact that there have now been four court orders to do so.  Each court order has resulted in my entitlement to my property diminishing with each subsequent order.

We had to return to court after the trial because the father refused to return my property and pay daycare.  We appeared before the same trial judge who actually chastised me for returning the matter to court and further reduced the court order so that there are now less than a dozen items that he has to return and his daycare responsibility was further reduced in half and limited to three months.  In July 2004, he attempted to return property that he stole from his current landlord.  His direction to the movers was that I had to accept the delivery in its entirety or everything had to be returned to his residence.  I obviously could not accept stolen property so I was not allowed to keep anything.  To date, he has still failed to return my property.

My eldest has been attending counselling for Children Who Have Witnessed Violence and Abuse since November 2004 and it is going well.  My middle son will attend the next group in the Winter/Spring session but he is doing extremely well.  It’s primarily my eldest who has suffered the brunt of the abuse and has been having behaviour issues.  My youngest son is just three so has experienced little affect and is a pure joy.

The boys now, although reluctantly, attend church with me every weekend that they are with me.  The two older boys are scheduled to receive their sacraments of First Communion and Confirmation in the Spring.  My middle one is looking forward to this while the eldest is still rebelling.  If he’s not ready then this will simply have to wait.

As for me, my employment was based in Toronto so I was forced to resign from my position as of Nov 2003.  As an HR professional, the bilingualism issue continued to be a barrier to employment throughout most of the year.  I was fortunate to secure a 6-week contract with DND in September 2004 which has been extended until April 2005.  I am hopeful that the experience will eventually lead to another opportunity.

I always believe that things happen for a reason.  Admittedly, I struggle to understand the reason behind the outcome of my trial.  I focus on the fact that the most important aspect of the trial was custody and I have sole custody and primary residence of the children.  They spend one night a week and every second weekend with their father.  The rest of the trial was money and stuff and that’s not what’s important in life.

While it has certainly been a challenging year, it has been overshadowed with the wonderful blessings that we have received.  We have been so very fortunate to have received the support and generosity of so many wonderful people.  I am often asked how I have stayed so positive during such challenging times.  My response is always that I recognize that there has been only one source of bad and so very many sources of good.  I have drawn enormous strength from the support, kindness, warmth and generosity of family, friends and strangers.  I believe that we choose our attitude and I choose to let the goodness overshadow all else.  Focusing on our blessings and recognizing all of our good fortune has made this a truly blessed year.

My home is filled with love and furnished with the generosity of so many.  I am thankful for the many blessings that we have.  I believe that my children do recognize how fortunate we are that so many people reached out to help us.  I will be eternally grateful for your generosity and support and it will take a lifetime to pay it forward.

My best wishes to all of you and your families during the Christmas holidays and throughout the New Year.  I hope you recognize the enormous difference you have made in our lives.  Although a mere thank you cannot even begin to express my gratitude, I thank you with all my heart!

Love,

Lise and the boys

Cindy Walker

Thank you Virtual Ministry for being there.

I first contacted V.M. when we needed help moving...and boy was it a big one.  On the day of the move, 8 strong men showed up before the moving van arrived.  The move started with a prayer out on the street (what a beautiful witness to all my new neighbors).  Men came from all over the city and some from as far as Limoges..."thanks again".

Please see: Virtual Ministry 82

I called on V.M. again for prayer when I became sick October 2001.  Praise be to God, those prayers were heard and answered.  As I was prepared to have my colon removed, the tests came back clean, no sign I was ever sick.

When my father passed away V.M. requested prayer for my family.  From that request I received many emails letting our family know we were in their prayers.  What a blessing at a very sad time in my life.

Thank you Lord and bless all those who have this site up and running as well as the faithful who respond to the needs of the community.

Cindy Walker