Why I Was Home schooled:

At home
The document concludes by recalling that faithful who "through illness or other just cause" are unable to participate in a public ceremony or to venerate an image of the Virgin, "may obtain a plenary indulgence in their own homes, or wherever they may be, if, with the soul completely removed from any form of sin, and with the intention of observing the aforesaid conditions as soon as possible, they unite themselves in spirit and in desire to the Supreme Pontiff's intentions in prayer to Mary Immaculate, and recite the Our Father and the Creed."

On Dec. 8, 1965, Pope Paul VI, in closing Vatican II, dedicated great praise to the Blessed Virgin who, as Mother of Christ, is Mother of God and spiritual Mother of all mankind.

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Moving Out of the Ghetto

  I was watching the tail end of “The Journey Home” on EWTN on Monday night. For those of you who don’t know, The Journey Home is a talk show featuring guests who have “come into the fullness” of faith by joining (or reverting back to) the Catholic faith. Past guests have come from every type of background: Protestant, Orthodox, Judaism, Atheism, Jehovah Witness, etc.

  On this particular night, the guest was a 30ish female singer – one Tatiana Cameron (her married name) – who is becoming well known in some Catholic circles in the U.S. While not yet mainstream, she was featured in a recent interview on Fox TV Cincinnati. Having picked up only the tail end of the program, I decided to go to her website, www.Idobelieve.com for more information. I was surprised to learn that she was a superstar in Eastern Europe before the fall of communism, and that she left it all behind to go to America – alone and unknown – to start her life over. Why? Because the “good life” didn’t fulfill the way she hoped it would. With the vacuum left by communism’s collapse, thousands of adoring fans looked to her for “answers” – and she had none to give. Besides this she had little or no privacy, and didn’t know what she wanted anymore, except “out.” I’ll let her website tell the rest of her story – which I highly recommend. (Make a point of going into her “concerts” page and clicking on her song “Magnificat” – a masterpiece).

  Just before I sign off on Tatiana, however, I’d like to comment on a statement she made near the end of her Journey Home interview. It was this: she recommended Catholics (and other Christians) with artistic leanings move to Hollywood and try to make a difference. Although she didn’t say it directly, her unspoken message was, “we can’t expect to change the world if we have a “Catholic Ghetto” mentality. I suspect she’d also say: “we need a perseverance and confidence which sees all the world as “fair game” - call it ‘taking dominion’”(Gen 1v28). For us viewers on the sidelines, I think it means praying confidently for our brothers and sisters in the arts –that they might be protected from the temptations around them and have the greatest impact on their peers and superiors around them, and the world.

  On this point, I remember speaking to a friend of mine who was finishing his PhD in Theology. I asked him where he planned on using it. He said at University of Toronto. I objected, saying, “but why don’t you teach at the seminary? They need good professors.” His answer surprised me: “It may be tougher teaching in a secular environment, but I believe I can serve the Lord more completely by being ‘in the world.’” He added, “Where else will those souls hear the truth, unless someone goes to them with real conviction?” I couldn’t refute him.

  Thank God there are Mel Gibsons and young professors’ like the fellow I spoke of above. The day after I saw Tatiana’s interview, I read that Hollywood has begun to bankroll more “pro-religious” movies and TV mini-series. The week after The Passion was released, for example, “The Chronicles of Narnia” (written by C.S. Lewis) was approved, as was “The Exorcism of Emily Rose” (produced by a Christian). More recently, two papal movies are coming to the small screen in December on ABC and CBS. In addition, a two-part “Life of St. Peter” was recently screened in Italy. The actor who played Peter - Omar Sharif, a Muslim convert from Christianity – had this to say about the role: “I was so moved by his character, I don’t think I can play anyone else again.” www.Idobelieve.com Yes, I do believe.

BRINGING IN THE SHOCK TROOPS.

   We’ve all felt overwhelmed at times.   Sometimes it’s the situation.  Sometimes it’s a person.   What we don’t always perceive is that our prayer strength, on its own, is sometimes not enough:  not the rosaries, not the adoration (though these tools are very important), not the Masses.  No, sometimes we’ve got to bring in God’s shock troops – dependable friends who will intercede for us.  And this takes humility.

When I worked as a Lay Chaplain for a Catholic high school one year, there was one religion teacher (who I’ll call Bill – not his real name) who objected to everything I said.  Well, almost everything.  He was in many ways what one would call a “practical atheist.”  That is, one who publicly confesses belief in Christ and the Catholic Church – but in practice discredits much of what Our Lord and His Church teaches.  Not surprisingly, he was aggressively upset when I spoke about pre-marital sex, saying, “you’ll damage the kids self-esteem.”  This I was prepared for. 

 What I wasn’t prepared for was resistance to a reflection I gave over the p.a. system on the role of Guardian Angels and Archangels.  This was met with looks of brooding and sullenness.  I was reminding staff and students that there was a supernatural reality  – one which many were ignoring.  Hence guilt and its unhealthy offspring – low self-esteem.  I was told to “tone it down.”

A similar response was received when I spoke about St Therese of Lisieux.  Saints, all saints, were perceived as “unrealistic” role models.  And The Holy Family …well…speaking about them was about as “out of touch” as one could get.  They just “didn’t fit the mold” of today’s family, where a lot of kids come from broken homes.  Needless to say, after months of listening to Bill’s b.s., (and a couple of shouting matches) I found myself hating him.  I even visualized myself bloodying his face.

   Thank God for Fr. Bob Bedard’s teaching on forgiveness.   I realized I had to let go of Bill, but to do this I needed extra prayer help for myself – so I asked friends to pray that I might respond in charity…that I might see the good side of Bill.  The Lord …didn’t let me down.  He helped me see that Bill – though misguided - had a lot of zeal.  He was like St. Paul before his conversion.  So I began to pray more for Bill and to simply acknowledge him respectfully, greeting him politely when we crossed paths.  Over time I had the humility of heeding advice he gave me on “hanging around the cafeteria” as a way of reaching more students  (my

 noontime chapel services weren’t drawing a huge crowd).  Bill’s advice made a difference.  More students began to visit my office for counsel or just to chat. 

As for relations with the Bill, we still had plenty of disagreements, but there was much more civility involved.  None of this would have happened had I not initially called a couple of friends for prayer support.  Instead, I would have lost my peace, lost my effectiveness to minister, and gained a permanent enemy.  Thank God the Lord moved me to get help in a time of testing – much like Moses did against the Amalekites:

Ex 17v11-12  “As long as Moses kept his arms raised, Israel had the advantage; when he let his arms fall, the advantage went to Amalek.  But Moses’ arms grew heavy, so they took a stone and put it under him and on this he sat, Aaron and Hur supporting his arms, one on one side, one on the other; and his arms remained firm till sunset.”

Sirach 9:14 -  Frequent the Company of the Learned

   The Solemnity of Corpus Christi is coming up soon.  A major solemnity.   And the Lord recently made me aware how easy it is for me to be distracted or seduced by “bread alone.”  And not just me.  A religious professional told me a while back of how a diocesan sponsored retreat was a really nice break from the hustle and bustle of parish life. The highlight was the food.  Not the spiritual food - that wasn’t even mentioned.  But that other food – sumptuous, succulent, yummifying, nose teasing, mouth-watering food. The “words of God” were there too, no doubt,…they just weren’t savoured – or so it seemed - as much as that other food.  They just weren’t noteworthy.  And that is sad.  

   It seems to me that whenever I attend a public function – and in particular a Church function – a similar choice presents itself.  I can emphasize “bread alone” topics of conversation like food and entertainment (which is OK up to a point), or I can attempt to steer the subject matter towards a loftier direction.  Suffice to say that Sirach 9 recently reminded me to “frequent the company of the learned, and make just men my table companions.”  Monsieur Sirach also advised me “to have all my conversation bear (in some way) on the Law of the Lord.”  It seems this Monsieur Sirach has been spying on me.  For a lot of my conversations at receptions recently have not had much “bearing on the Law of the Lord.”

And this has been largely my fault:  I have missed opportunities to speak with some wise people - sometimes because a small “wait” was involved to get to them.  Others, who I believe have a good prayer life, I have presumptuously “written off” in a subtle sort of way.  It’s not that I dislike them.  Rather, I’ve said to myself, “They move in different circles now.  So I’m not going to invest much of my  time (if any) with some people I’m unlikely to get “much back” from in the form of friendship.  And so I have withheld myself from hearing some things the Lord just may want me to hear through them. 

   And yet for those who I am more familiar with, I too often have not been attentive to what the Lord might have me ask – or hear - from them.  I too often haven’t moved beyond the “How’s it going?” type of conversation. This “lead in” can break the ice, but that’s all it will do.   Even discussing – – the ministries we’re involved in won’t necessarily impart any real blessing on those the Lord puts before us.   Rather, we’ve got to look for the opportunities to ask questions like “so what’s the Lord teaching you in all this?”   or “Is this (work, ministry) leaving you any time for the Lord…or yourself?”  or “Do you have a sense of how you’re to respond concretely to what you’re facing / going through?”   I think you get the point.

This past weekend, I had a chance to put into practice some of these musings at a brunch following the “first Mass” of Fr. Anthony Hannon, a newly ordained priest for the Archdiocese of Ottawa.  I asked the Lord beforehand to steer me toward the people he wanted me to meet, and to be at the center of our conversations.  He didn’t let me down.  The spiritual food was great, really great …and uh, so was that other stuff – the brunch.

A Lesson in God’s Timing

   Last Saturday was typical enough. Yet, it wasn’t. I got up a little late, since I stayed up late to watch the end of a French movie (I’m trying to improve my French). Since it was a rainy day, I decided to get my laundry under way first thing. I also had been planning on doing the parish bank reconciliation (a monthly task). My plan was to get to Mass at St. George’s (next door), then pour myself into the bank rec, and have a little time left over in the afternoon to pick up a few things. For some reason, I felt I should try and learn to make crepes properly for breakfast – but I felt I didn’t have time. But the thought kept persisting – so I thought, well, I’ll get the batter ready before Mass. So I found a recipe and prepared the batter. Then, when Mass time came around (at 9AM), I felt a strong impulse to put off Mass until 11AM when I could take in the French Mass at St. Francois D’Assise. So I heeded this prompting.

   I then got to work on the crepes, which turned out fabulously. I also decided to make enough for that day’s visiting priest who drove by to cover for the pastor who was away on holidays.  When he came in, he gladly accepted my offer.  I gave him the first batch. Just as I was ready to start making what I would eat, someone came in to tell me that there was going to be a French Mass right next door in 20 minutes.  A local French Charismatic group was using the church and hall for the day. I thought, heck, I’ll save the time and go here. So I did.  At the end of Mass the priest led us in a special “consecration of our wills” to the Lord. I considered this a real privilege, since I know blessings typically follow any formal consecration to our Lord.

   When I returned to the rectory, I decided to save the batter for the following day, finished up my laundry, and went to check my e-mails.  For some reason I felt I should review a web-site link a good acquaintance sent me three or four months back. His niece had died the previous year of cancer, he said, and before she died had set up this terrific website.  “A young girl named Erin who inspired others,” he said. …Well, I’ve got to tell you there have been about a half a dozen times I felt I should go to her site, but something always pulled me away. This day it was different.  I felt pushed toward it.  As I read, I discovered that it was a year to the day that her funeral “Mass of Resurrection” was held – April 30th, 2004.  I thought, “Lord, you’re inviting me to her birthday party…you’re inviting me to share in the graces you’re dispensing on her.”  It was a wonderful morning. I read of how the Lord spoke to her the Christmas before she died, and gave her enduring hope for the uncertain days which remained.  I truly felt privileged.

   Had I gone to her website on another day, it still would have been special.  Visiting it on this day – her birthday in heaven - made it extra special.  My role in it was simply to be attentive and obedient.  My laundry still got done, the bank reconciliation still got done – but on God’s timing, not mine.  He had some special detours in mind.  

 By the way, Erin’s website is http://www.angelfire.com/on4/eemg/

A TRIPLE PLAY

For anyone who has played baseball, they know what a  "triple play " is.  This happens when runners are on at least two bases (or even three bases) and all three get out at once.   Typically, a  "line drive " is caught by the third baseman, who then fires the ball to second, where it is quickly relayed to first before runners can  "return to the bags " before being called out. "   For baseball fans it is a  "grace moment. "

In daily life, there are similar occasions when we experience  "exceptional " periods of grace.  In the short term, we all know what it's like to be driving in the city and hit five, ten, fifteen green lights in a row.  We smile at such moments.  The wind is at our back.  And we savour them.  Yet, oddly enough, there are days when we don't immediately recognize the  "green lights " which visit us.  They hit us  "after the fact. "  We have to  "pull back " in order to  "see " them.  I experienced one such day on the occasion of John Paul II's funeral Mass.  The first such  "green light " was being able to meet my sister for lunch.  She works about 20 minutes away by car, and my work does not allow me to get away for long during lunch.   It was our first such lunch engagement in four years.  On top of that, she paid!  (Since Bill Gates I am not).

When I returned from lunch to the office, the fellow in the office next door asked me if I needed a DVD player or knew anyone who did:  "It's in perfect working condition...it's a cheapo, but it works good, " he said.   I answered,  "no, I don't need one, but I know someone who'd be happy to take it. "   "Great! " he said.   Green Light number two.  

Later, when I got home for supper (I rent the top floor of a church rectory), I was told a local drug addict/beggar had come to the door earlier in the day.  He had a female social worker with him.  He had visited the rectory several times in the past looking for money.  Sometimes at hours that disturb.  On this particular day, money was not the concern.  He told the pastor that he had just finished a 1 month rehab program in western Ontario.   "It's the most I've ever learned in my life, " he said.   "I really want to change my life...and by the way, tell that  "other guy " who lives here about me, too. "  (That  "other guy " being me.)   Green light number three - a troubled man being set free!  

It Happened In Our City

 It's often the case that I hear a homily or talk about something wonderful that happens to someone  "out there. "  It often has a big impact on me.  For example, Ralph Martin, at last fall's FIRE Rally, gave witness to a Mid-western scientist who brought several Chinese scientists to the Lord.  Apparently, one of the Chinese delegates to an agric-conference was  "brought low " by a severe migraine headache.  His American colleague went to the man's room, gently tapped the door, and offered to pray with him.  The man politely conceded, so the American gave a short,  "In Jesus Name " prayer for the man's healing.  Within an hour the Chinese was at the American's door.  His headache was gone.

From that day forward, the man's life had changed.  He has become a follower of Jesus, and has been sending scientists to his American colleague for several years now - more than a few of which have come to the Lord.  I am happy to know this.  It's a wonderful story indeed.   Even though it happened  "out there, " I believe it, because I believe Ralph Martin - the story's messenger.  But similar things are happening closer to home.  

Why can't we hear more stories like the one Ralph gave witness to?

I think it's because we don't ask the Lord enough.  For the last two or three years now, I try and make a habit of asking the Lord for the  "real news. "   I didn't always do this.  But I find my hope has gone up significantly since I have.  I often say,   "Jesus, I know your grace abounds the more, (Romans 5v20) please show me your miracles, please show me the real news. "   And He has.  

Thursday night the Lord issued a  "late edition. "   I was at St. Pat's for Holy Thursday.   I originally planned to go strictly for confession, and then return to St. George's (my home parish) for the service there.   But something told me to stay at St. Pat's.  So I did.  It was a beautiful Mass.  The choir was excellent, the pipe organ a treat, the homily insightful, & the adoration solemn.  Feeling a little tired at 10:10PM, I prepared to leave.  But again I felt a tug saying,  "stay. "  So I did.   The church was to close at 10:30 anyway.  The Lord must want me to spend this extra  "hour " with him, I thought.  Twenty minutes later, as I sat in the back row, Fr. Lindsay approached me with keys in hand, preparing to lock the doors of the church.   I mentioned to him,   "was that your mother I saw earlier this evening (with a bounce in her step and shoulders back)? "   "Yes, " he said... I continued,  "wasn't she really sick? "   "Yes, " he said,   "her doctor said it was a miracle...he'd never seen anything like it...she had heart failure, kidney failure, a punctured lung (which the doctors mistakenly inflicted), both her lungs had filled with her own blood, she had double pneumonia, and a red blood cell count of 51 (which is very, very low). "   And I continued,  "She's OK now? "   "Yes, " he said,  "she's fine, she's living a normal life. "  A normal life, I thought. Just another day in the life of grace.   And...it happened...in our city.

Insomnia or Wake Up Call?

   Last night (A Thursday night) I was awakened by my digital watch's alarm.   It was only 11:40 PM, but I had been sleeping for an hour and was rather annoyed.   I pressed what I thought was the proper "disarm" button - since it stopped the beep beep sound - and mumbily rolled back into my dream...for all of five minutes.   Off went the alarm again.   Again I pressed three of the four surface buttons on the watch thinking, "one of them has to shut this thing up."   And so it did, but I was angry and felt like taking a hammer to the watch.   "Who could design such a stupid, complicated watch," I thought.   On top of this, I just wasn't confident enough to try sleeping again without finding the watch's proper instructions - so I set about looking for them in my dresser drawer - no luck.  I returned to bed.   But I just couldn't let myself rest.  "I can't trust that watch," I said.   So I get up again.   This time, after three minutes I find the instructions behind a sock or hanky or screwdriver or some such thing.   Squinting my eyes through the pigmified, miniscule print (issued in 9 languages - that's correct, 9), I finally discover how to "disarm" this "simple" watch's alarm.

First,   Go to Button 3 (of 4 Buttons), and press it three times to get Time Mode.

Then Press and Hold Button 2 while pressing Button 1.   Simple, Eh?   Thank God it works.   Now I can sleep.   But I recognize that I've become rather stressed by the whole exercise, so I take another 15 minutes to release the stress I've just picked up before I decide to get back to sleep.  

   Later, the following morning, I said to myself:   "if I was a parent, that alarm episode could just as easily have been my baby crying, or a teenager coming in a little late."   The "watch" was obviously a little test from the Lord.   A little sacrifice he needed.   Which comes to my topic for today:  Sleep.   How do you respond to the "wake up calls" the Lord presents to you?   From my experience there are three common types of "wake up calls" the Lord sends   (outside of when he lets me sleep in).   For me, they come anywhere between 2:00 to 4:30 AM.   And there is usually the sense that a fair chunk of the "fatigue" is off.   Not always, but usually.

   To use sports analogy, the first call is for a "regular practice."   There is a sense that there aren't any particularly pressing burdens out there, just that the Lord wants me to make the most of this quiet "night" hour.   I may be a little tired, but I push myself that little bit, and after a short "mental warm-up' - I turn on my bedside light and sit up -  I gradually "come to" and am  ready to absorb what He wants to teach me.   Sixty or 80 minutes later, I'm ready to sleep again til 7AM or so.  

 The second type of wakeup call is a bit like a "one on one" competition or even a   street fight.   It is accompanied by a sense that I need to be alert and ready to deal with something personal that affects me.   There is considerable stress on rising.   Trying to return to sleep immediately in this state would be utterly senseless.   In this case I usually start by practicing one of the "letting go" exercises I spoke of earlier in this column. (See VM 280, 281)   Under this scenario, the Lord usually tries to impart a message of "be watchful" or "it's decision time."

   The third type of wakeup call - unlike the first and second - is definitely a "big game day."   It is accompanied by a very strong sense to intercede for some person(s) or situation outside of myself.   This call can also have considerable stress   - but with a twist - we know our life is otherwise going "pretty good," and so we recognize the Lord is asking us to "put on the spiritual armour"  (get ready for warfare) and to take up the role of Simon the Cyrenean on behalf of another.

   Today, (Saturday morning) is just such a day.   It's 6:15 AM the morning after I started writing this piece, and it's definitely a "Type 3 Call."   Serious spiritual warfare.   I already spent an hour in prayer earlier on - between 2AM and 3AM - but I sense the Lord needs  more prayer support for what's going on today.   The only event I can think of that might warrant this added prayer burden is the Conservative Party Convention - where speeches are to be given later this morning.   I'll admit I'm more tired than usual, but I feel a bit like Elijah, who wants to go to sleep, but the Lord's angel keeps waking him:

"Then he lay down and went to sleep.  But an angel touched him and said, "Get up and eat."  He looked around and there at his head was a scone baked on hot stones, and a jar of water.  He ate and drank and then lay down again.   But the angel of Yahweh came back a second time and touched him and said, "Get up and eat, or the journey will be too long for you."   So he got up and ate and drank, and strengthened by that food he walked for forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God." (1 Kings 19v5-8)

 Who would have guessed?   Like Elijah, giving the Lord a bit of my sleep is helping me (and fellow believers) gain a lot of endurance - not just for today's battle or journey - but for those of the days ahead as well!

   God Bless,

   Dan

The Art of Letting Go - Part Three

Today I'm going to share with you some passages of Scripture that really helped me get through the dark days of chronic pain. Back then, I made a point of memorizing verses like those below, because they applied specifically to gaining strength and courage; I told the Lord often that I believed these verses were true. Needless to say, the verses themselves offered great hope: 

Ps 18v29: With you I storm the barbican (tower; drawbridge). With my God I leap the rampart.

Ps 18v32: This God who girds me with strength... 

Ps 18v33: ...who makes my feet like the deer and holds me from falling on the heights, who trains my hands for battle, my arms to bend a bow of bronze. ... with care you train me, wide room you make for my steps under me, my feet have never faltered."  

If you suffer any physical pain, then make a point of memorizing verses like those above. At the time I was praying over these, I could not lift 10 pounds without causing three days of serious pain. I could not walk more than 80 yards without causing similar pain in my knees. I had to measure every outing by the minute, by the yard. But these verses gradually increased my confidence in the Lord's power - like mercury rising in a thermometer. I would repeat them to myself aloud, slowly, and firmly on the exhale cycle of breathing. This needs to be said again.  

I would repeat them to myself aloud, slowly, and firmly on the exhale cycle of breathing.  

This had the effect of raising a vivid picture in my mind: I pictured myself bounding up rocks like a deer to a rocky peak; and bending a bow of heavy bronze - holding the arrow steady before releasing on a target. The combination of visualization and breathing exercises gave me a new sense of power - my lungs unconsciously began to expand and fill with air.  

Later in the day, when pain twinges would hit me, I would try and remind myself of these verses. They truly did act as a "sword of the spirit" in resisting that sinking feeling, that despair which wanted to possess my soul if I would let it. In the past, before I began practicing this type of mental prayer consistently, it often did. Not so afterwards. I still had my tearful moments, but hope began to raise it's flag more and more and say: "We're not leaving. We're here to stay." Praised be the Holy Trinity.

The Art of Letting Go - Part 2 

Last time I mentioned three elements which help us let go of our troubles, or at least reduce their weight. Those three were:  

1) to be as still as possible when in pain.

2) to keep a good mix in our spiritual diet.

3) to find a safe emotional place to visit where we can be ourselves.  

Before going further with today's piece, I'd just like to say that I hope you don't think I'm being arrogant by speaking of "letting go" of troubles as an "art." I know I am far from perfect, but I have learned some important lessons at a heavy price. You see, in the past, worry got to me a lot more than I cared for. Crosses were seriously compounded as a result. That happens less now. Crosses are still there, but they don't snowball nearly as much. A major reason for this lightening is that I began to pray for the willingness to believe in the power of God's word.  

Praying for this willingness to "believe" is important, because many of us feel it's just too hard to trust the Lord completely. We've been hurt, and our scars may not have healed fully. It's important we admit this. Tell the Lord you find it scary to risk again. But remember that the Lord will not "quench the wavering flame, (Is 42v3)" nor will He "test you beyond your strength." (1 Cor 2v10) Let these truths soak in. Then ask yourself: "Does God truly want me to live the abundant life?" (John 10v10) Of course he does. "Does he have the power to change my attitude for the better?" Of course he does. He wants me to admit my fears, resentments, unbelief, despair, etc." As we let these truths soak in, we will muster the courage to enter uncharted territory with the Lord. And as we step out as Abraham did (not knowing where he was going; Heb11v9), the Lord will help us along the way.

I remember a day pilgrimage in Ireland, climbing the famous Mt. Cro Patrick (where St. Patrick had a hermitage); my friend and I were tired, and it was an overcast day. We were thinking of heading back before reaching the summit, since we'd arrived late and didn't want to climb back down in the dark. Suddenly a strong tail wind literally pushed us upward for over 100-150 yards to the next plateau in the ascent. It was obviously from the Lord. We then finished the climb with new courage. The Lord wants us to finish what we start. When it comes to letting go, it's not the physical fatigue that will tempt us to quit, it's the apparent "boredom" or fear associated with silence. My first silent retreat (actually only an evening of silence - from 8PM until breakfast the next morning) - nearly killed me. So perhaps it's best to start with ten minutes of silence in a quiet place, free of distraction. Expect it to take a little while to catch the Lord's frequency - much like tuning an old AM or Short Wave radio. Invoking the Holy Spirit helps us tune in, however. (Pray in tongues if for a couple of minutes if you can.) At this point, I follow a two step process. First, I name the burden and visualize Jesus nailing it to the cross. For example, I visualize Him nailing my temptation to the cross, or my loneliness to the cross. I tell Him, slowly and repeatedly "Jesus, you nail my temptation to the cross," or "you nail my loneliness to the cross," or whatever it is. If I am in financial worry, I slowly and repeatedly say, "Jesus, you nail my fear of poverty to the cross;" After several minutes, or sometimes after only a few seconds, the burden(s) begin to lift. It feels like a cracking in the wall of the burden. I usually start to yawn; my eyes often water. And my heart feels lighter.

I then follow this with a meditation focused on receiving from the Lord. For example, if I have just let go of "fear of poverty", I will slowly and repeatedly affirm to the Lord, "I am the richest of men", or "you cannot be outdone in generosity, Lord." How does he answer? With riches you can't buy: Peace of Mind.

The Art of "Letting Go - Part 1."

    Most of you who know me know that for several years I battled chronic back pain.  Two bad discs in the low back.  Not pretty.  I also developed bad knees and shoulders.  Weakness in one area spread to weakness in other areas.  It was a cycle of flare-up...then rest a few days for pain control...then start again.   Each time I re-started, I was a little weaker.  Before long my vitality threshold was on the ropes.  My life - as I knew it - was over.  Every western, eastern and upside down medical professional told me (after a few visits) that they couldn't help me.  It was an awful feeling.  Prison without bars.  I'll admit I knew the theory of "redemptive suffering" but living it out was something altogether different.  Crucifixion.  There's no other word for it.  The misunderstanding of loved ones, tears, panic attacks.  You face it all.  Yet it wasn't all crucifixion.  Living with chronic pain gave me more opportunity to grow in silence and trust and waiting.  This, because I had to spend lots of time alone - not by choice, but because social outings were severely restricted when I had to lie down every five minutes.  

    One thing I learned was to consult others who suffered but held a peace about them.  One lady with severe arthritis told me to be as still as possible when my pain was particularly bad.  I learned that a good way to calm my thoughts was to focus on breathing - in through the nose slowly, and out through the nose slowly.  I then would gently introduce the healing words Je-sus and mer-cy into my breathing pattern, breathing in on the first syllable and out on the second syllable:  i.e. in on Je and out on sus.  This exercise had a very relaxing effect.   Another skill I learned was to "mix up" my spiritual diet to stave off boredom.   When scriptural material was dry, for example, I would complement it with another book or video which really engaged me.  In particular, the Catechism section on prayer made a very strong impact on me.  It reminded me of what was true - that God's grace was ever present and accessible.  A video series on patience called "When God When?" by Joyce Meyer was also particularly good.   Bookwise,  Joni Ericksen Tada's "When God Weeps" was a powerful testimony  on the strength which takes root when one truly begins to accept suffering.  In short,  a good mix of Christian radio, TV, tapes and videos all helped in strengthening my hope against the self pity, anger and despair which had a habit of surfacing when the pain and isolation got to me.

    A major lifeline through much of this trial was Fred Schubert's "Our Lady of His Mercy Friendship Centre."  Fred gave me permission to lie on the carpet as needed.  At the centre I met other people who were graduates cum laude from the School of Hard Knocks.  It was a lesson in humility.  While in the "regular world" I was now a "lesser person" to more than a few (since I wasn't producing); here I was an equal.  I was accepted and loved.  The fact is we need a "safe place" to come to in order to "let go" and let our true selves unfold.  A place where "yes, but" is not the first response we hear.  This was such a place.  There was love and a chance to pray with others.  The Rosary and Chaplet of Divine Mercy were regular fixtures.  In short, visiting the Centre helped me get the focus off myself and begin to receive love again.

   A similar lifeline was Pam Howe's thanksgiving suppers.  She called them pot-luck suppers, but they were really thanksgiving suppers.  You see, at these suppers a tradition developed of offering thanksgiving to the Lord for some work of grace he had done in the recent past. This was a dessert like no other.  The ice cream on the cake were the hugs you received (and gave) at such gatherings.  If you could put love on a cone, this was it.  

   ...to be continued

It's Not a Coincidence

It happened again.  I wasn't prepared for it.  I had just gotten over some serious stress hurdles at work and planned to take a long weekend to visit my parents for my mom's birthday.  Things were looking good.  The weather was great, I had Friday off.  But I had one little chore to do for Msgr. Latour, my landlord at St. George's Church.   I promised to submit the parish' financial statement to the archdiocese before the deadline that weekend.  I'd finished doing the bank reconciliations for the past several months, and felt it would be a simple one or two hour exercise to wrap up the financials...after all, the software had already done the work - or so I thought.  Done?   Well, not quite.  As a result of human error / misallocations, my little "morning postponement" turned into a marathon!  I finally shut off the computer at 8:30pm that night and left for Belleville the following morning.  

A couple of months ago the same thing happened, I was going to take off early from work and head to Belleville for a long weekend at my parents when...emergency meetings were held at our office.  Then the software I was using crashed...leaving me to prepare an important report manually.  Again, instead of a leisurely travel day, I spent the day - and evening - chasing deadlines.  It just happened that a fax arrived that morning from Revenue Canada demanding a certain payroll report be submitted from me by fax before 8pm that night or we would be faced with a nasty penalty.

After much frustration I completed the report.  At five minutes to 8, I was leaning over the fax machine.  As I punched in the number, the impossible looked like it was going to happen.  The fax was going to be rejected, at least it looked that way ...  five seconds,  ten seconds,  then fifteen seconds passed!  No confirmation of receipt!  Finally I blurted out: "Bastards!! #@$%&**#% I waited around here for five hours to do this stupid report and then your #@$%#!  Revenue Canada fax machine doesn't work!!!  Then, suddenly (after embarrassing myself before the Lord) I hear the squiggly, squiggly sound which means the fax has been received!  It went through after all.  At this, I put my head down and said, "Lord, I failed the test!"   And it was a test.  Make no mistake about it.  Jesus was probably looking over his glasses at me with that look that says:  "You can do better, you know."  And my fake smile answer would be, "Uhh, yes, Lord, I uh do know.  I'll, uh, try and be more patient next time."  And I have tried to be more patient.  In fact, while I huffed and puffed somewhat at the second "layover" I had to encounter just this past weekend, I didn't curse or complain as much like I did back in December.  And I'm realizing I have to grow in humility and accept the sacrifices of the Lord's design.  I have to trust that the Lord knows just what to use to toughen up my soft spots.  For convenience sake, I'll name God's latest tool in dealing with me the "on-call sacrifice."  Call it sacrifice on short notice.  There's no question of its effective.  It grates against my will more than any fasting I may undertake on my own initiative.

One last observation about these similar events of the last two months.  Both happened on a First Friday!  Coincidental?  I think not.  It seems the Lord had a need for a special sacrifice from me those particular days.  And not only from me.  He asked my parents to share in it too.  They had to wait for my arrival.

THANKS TO GOD
I pray that this will bless you as it blessed me.

Hello God,

I called tonight

To talk a little while

I need a friend who'll listen
To my anxiety and trial.
You see, I can't quite make it

Through a day just on my own...
I need your love to guide me,
So I'll never feel alone.
I want to ask you please to keep
My family safe and sound.
Come and fill their lives with confidence
For whatever fate they're bound.
Give me faith, dear God, to face
Each hour throughout the day,
And not to worry over things
I can't change in any way.
I thank you God for being home
And listening to my call,
For giving me such good advice
When I stumble and fall.
Your number, God, is the only one
That answers every time.
I never get a busy signal,
Never had to pay a ! dime.
So thank you, God, for listening
To my troubles and my sorrow.
Good night, God, I love You too,
And I'll call again tomorrow!

The man whispered, "God, speak to me"   and a meadowlark sang. 
But, the man did not hear.

So the man yelled, "God, speak to me" and the thunder rolled across the sky. 

But, the man did not listen. The man looked around and said,
"God let me see you." And a star shined brightly.

But the man did not see. And, the man shouted,
"God show me a miracle." And, a life was born.

But, the man did not notice. So, the man cried out in despair,
"Touch me God, and let me know you are here."

Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man. But, the man brushed the butterfly away.

and walked on.

I found this to be a great reminder that God is always around us in the little and simple things that we take for granted ... even in our electronic age.

So I would like to add one more:

The man cried, "God, I need your help!"
And an e-mail arrived reaching out with good news and encouragement.

But, the man deleted it and continued crying ...

Don't miss out on a blessing because it isn't packaged the way that you expect.

Expect the unexpected.....  Have A Happy Day!

Before starting the main article today - a reprint from Catholic News Service - I have a bit of news to pass on. On the HOME PAGE, you read about the men's breakfasts, weel as an old Pentecostal minister once said to me, "bring your friends, and if you don't have any friends, then bring your relatives!"  

For more information contact Jim Meuse at jimmeuse@virtualministry.com

VM274 ... Plenary indulgences for Year of the Eucharist 

ARTICLE: Jan. 14 (CWNews.com) - Pope John Paul II has granted a plenary indulgence for Catholics who participate in veneration of the Blessed Sacrament during the Year of the Eucharist.   He has also granted a plenary indulgence to those who recite Vespers and Night Prayers before the tabernacle. 

These indulgences were announced by the Vatican on January 14. The formal decree granting the indulgences was dated December 25-- Christmas Day and issued by the Apostolic Penitentiary. Cardinal James Francis Stafford, the penitentiary major, announced that the decree was approved by Pope John Paul II on December 17.

A plenary indulgence is the remission of all temporal punishment due to sin. The indulgences are subject to the usual conditions: that the individual seeking the indulgence must make a full sacramental Confession, be free from all attachment to sin, receive the Eucharist, and pray for the intentions of the Holy Father.

The decree notes that the faithful may obtain the indulgence "each and every time they participate attentively and piously in a sacred function or a devotional exercise undertaken in honour of the Blessed Sacrament, solemnly exposed and conserved in the tabernacle." Similarly clerics, religious, and others who pray the Liturgy of the Hours can obtain the indulgence "each and every time they recite-- at the end of the day, in company or in private -- Vespers and Night Prayers before the Lord present in the tabernacle."

For those who "through illness or other just cause" cannot visit a church to venerate the Eucharist, the decree allows a plenary indulgence if they "make the visit spiritually and with the heart's desire, and recite the Our Father and the Creed, adding a pious invocation to Jesus in the Sacrament."

The Apostolic Penitentiary instructs all pastors to inform Catholics about these indulgences "in the most convenient manner," and asks priests to be prepared to hear confessions and lead services of veneration in order to help the faithful receive the indulgences.

The decree also reiterates the Pope's instruction for local churches to make their own special plans for veneration of the Blessed Sacrament during the Year of the Eucharist.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

http://www.cwnews.com/news/viewstory.cfm?recnum=3D34637

This news story originally appeared on the Catholic World News site.

Catholic World News, the pioneer in online Catholic news services, offers daily headline stories, analysis, and discussion of world events from the perspective of loyal but independent Catholic journalists.

To learn more about Catholic World News, to register for our free Weekly News Summary, or to become a premium subscriber and receive headline news coverage every weekday, please visit [ http://www.CWNews.com ].

23 Ways To Identify A Faithful Parish
CRISIS Magazine - Special e-Report
January 14, 2005
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Dear Friend,

It has been almost three weeks since I last wrote you. For that I apologize. Our office was closed for the Christmas break and then, upon returning, I was hit with a particularly aggressive virus. (I'll spare you the details.)

So please accept a very belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I enjoyed both with my wife and some friends and family at our home in Baltimore. We didn't have the snow that I always hope for on Christmas day, but we were able to enjoy a roaring fire and a lot of great conversation.

In my last email, you'll remember that I asked for your advice on a letter I received from one of our readers. She's a non-Catholic who's interested in entering the Church, but wants to make sure she gets involved with a solid parish -- one that follows and promotes authentic Catholicism.

So, she asked, what kinds of things should she look for when she walks into a parish church for the first time? Are there any easy, tell-tale ways to gauge the health and fidelity of that particular parish?

An excellent question. And since it deserves a good answer, I thought I'd ask for your input. Thank heavens I did, since you had several pieces of advice that I'd never considered before. In fact, there were so many first-rate suggestions, I've grouped them together and turned them into a short e-Report. Please feel free to send this to anyone you think would benefit from it. (You might also print it out and save it in case you move and need to find a new parish yourself.)

The following compilation comes in no particular order, and owing to the length, I wasn't able to include every suggestion. Nor, incidentally, do these 23 items contain the sum total of everything that makes up a great parish. Since the question centered on a parish's fidelity, I've tried to remain within those bounds.

Before I give you the list, I need to make an important final note: In going through the 23 points, it's important to take them as a whole, rather than focus on this or that specific item. For example, it is certainly true that it's difficult to worship reverently in an ugly, pray-barn type church. (You know the kind I mean.) But this itself doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad parish. It may well be the case that the current pastor arrived long after the church was built and is simply stuck with a less-than-glorious structure.

Having said that, taken together, I do think these points can help you identify a solid parish.

Let me know if you agree. / Have a wonderful weekend, / Brian

23 Ways To Identify a Faithful Parish

1. There is at least one daily Mass. Obviously, if a parish shares a pastor with other parishes, this may not always be possible. But barring that, a parish needs to offer daily Mass.

2. Confession is offered for a set time... not just "by appointment only." The absolute importance of that sacrament must not be diminished.

3. The tabernacle is inside the main church in a prominent place. It's always frustrating to have to play "Where's Jesus?" when you walk into a parish for the first time. I recall once when visiting a church I'd never been in before, I confusedly genuflected to everything from the cantor to a statue of St. Therese before I figured out where the tabernacle was.

4. The church has kneelers. Period.

5. The church doesn't have a sign in the front that describes itself as a "Catholic Community." I know, this one seems petty at first, but it tends to be true. If a parish has an objection to the word "church," that's a good indication that a larger problem exists. And if that parish magnifies the nonsense with a sign that says something like, "An Open, Inclusive Community of Catholic Christians Who Care and Share," stop, turn around, and run.

6. As you enter the church, you see people in the pews in prayer or, at least, reverent silence. If, on the other hand, it looks like social time down at the bingo parlor, that's a bad sign.

7. The Mass is not intentionally altered through the use of inclusive language.

8. The Mass is said according to the General Instruction of the Roman Missal and the instructions of the local bishop. Improvisation is great in jazz. Mass isn't jazz.

9. The gospel is not being read, nor the homily given, by someone other than a priest or deacon.

10. Latin has pride of place in the Mass. It's right there in the documents of the Second Vatican Council. That should be reflected in the liturgy itself.

11. The bread for the Eucharist isn't made with added ingredients not allowed by the Church. Honey, for example.

12. The liturgical music focuses on God, not the community. We are there, after all, to worship Him, not ourselves. And there's never a good reason to sing songs about bridges over troubled waters. You can do that at home, Mr. Garfunkel.

13. Extraordinary ministers do not outnumber the parishioners. There's a reason, after all, that we refer to them as EXTRAORDINARY ministers. We only use them when there are too many people for the priest and deacon to handle.

14. If you're able to find the mission statement of the parish (it's often carried in the bulletin), make sure it says something about fidelity to the Magisterium of the Church.

15. And while you're thumbing through the bulletin, see if there are other good groups there, like the Knights of Columbus, Legion of Mary, St. Vincent de Paul, and Holy Name Society. A faithful Bible study group is also a great sign.

16. The parish offers some form of Eucharistic adoration.

17. The parish has an active Pro-Life ministry, as well as a ministry that cares for the poor.

18. The priest wears his collar. Now, obviously, if you see your local pastor jogging one morning, he's not going to be wearing his clericals. But a priest should generally look the part. It's an important witness to the secular world and a sign that he recognizes the great value of his own vocation.

19. The pastor isn't afraid to preach on the tough issues: abortion, divorce, contraception, cloning, etc. That's not to say that every homily should cover those topics. But a priest should truly believe the Church's teaching and defend them without pause.

20. The parish's marriage preparation program includes instruction in Natural Family Planning (NFP). And if someone involved in the program describes NFP as "the rhythm method," go immediately limp and drop to the ground. With luck, he'll think you passed out and will take you to the emergency room, far, far away from that parish.

21. The church has a vibrant religious education program for both children and adults based on the Catechism of the Catholic Church. You might also try to find out who's involved in the program and where they received their own formation.

22. The church's Website doesn't link to dissident groups like Call to Action, Voice of the Faithful, or Catholics for a Free Choice.

And finally...

23. If there's a literature rack in the church, look at the publications the parish is carrying. Dissident magazines or newspapers tend to go hand in hand with a dissident parish. On the other hand, should you see a copy of Crisis in the rack, join that parish. The pastor is clearly a man of great taste and refinement.

***** LEARN THE REAL CAUSE OF THE CRISIS IN THE CHURCH *****

Sex abuse scandals... irreverent liturgies... homosexuality in the seminaries... liberal theology preached from the pulpit...

You know all about the crisis in the Church. But you've never heard the full story. When did the collapse in the Church occur... and what REALLY caused it?

Fr. Benedict Groeschel knows. He was there when it happened... 10 years BEFORE Vatican II.

What he saw will surprise you.

Click here to learn more: http://www.crisismagazine.com/products.htm
[Cut and paste into your browser if the link isn't active]
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Please forward this letter to anyone you think might benefit from it.

Who is your Dr. Phil?

I don't watch Dr. Phil very much.   I've caught his show a little here and a little there - usually in the company of relatives or a visitor who's been channel surfing.   He has his admirers, and then he has his "devotees."  And the reason he has devotees is that, for many, he is the "wisest" counselor they know.   In their own personal circle of friends and acquaintances, they don't have anyone who can "sort out" matters of delicacy the way Dr. Phil does.   In other words, they don't have (or don't recognize) anyone among their acquaintances with the "depth" of wisdom or experience to help them.

As Christians we truly are a blessed lot, I can count about a half a dozen "flesh and blood" friends and acquaintances with excellent insight.   But I didn't gain their acquaintance overnight.   I had to "hang around" prayer groups and "coffee talks" (after Mass), and "Men's breakfasts" and such before I recognized those who had "something more" to offer.   And sometimes my "first impressions" were wrong - terribly wrong.   I recall about 5 years ago asking the Lord to show me his "hidden saints."   What a shock I received.   The Lord opened my eyes to two Catholics (from different parishes) who  I had passed over as somewhat eccentric.   I have since made closer acquaintance with both and have been much enriched by their understanding and experience.

Over time I have found the Lord "loosening the grip" on some of these "counselors," however, who I have tended to lean too heavily on.   In my case, these certain few were people who were instrumental in helping me at the beginning of my conversion, and through a time of crisis in my life.   But these "loosenings" have been good for me.   They've taught me to take risks and take responsibility - which gives confidence.   We'll never grow up if we're always "checking in" for approval.   So it's a question of balance.   We are to both "seek the counsel of the wise" (Prov 13v20) where weighty matters are concerned - and at the same time learn to lean more and more on the Lord for our "day to day" challenges.

   God Bless, Dan ... Isaiah 38:15-17