An added piece of gossip...John O'Brien, son of writer Michael O'Brien, when asked (at a men's breakfast at Annunciation) if there was a chance his Dad's "Father Elijah" might be turned into a movie, told me: "...funny you should ask, I've just finished writing the script, and yes, there are people who want to see it become a movie...please keep this in your prayers."

Very informative five minute "Harambee Video" link below. It describes in a very brief nutshell what the average lifespan, earnings, etc. are for sub-Saharan Africans along with footage of a couple of Opus Dei ministries founded to help Africa after the canonization of St. Jose Maria Escriva.

God Bless, Dan
p.s. at the bottom, I have added a good little parable - heck, maybe it's true!

TESTIMONIES
God, rock and a violin
Manuel Lamberti is from Puerto La Cruz in Venezuela. He is 19 years old, studies violin and plays in a rock band. For two years, he was the first violin of the Youth Orchestra of the State of Anzoátegui. He is a numerary member of Opus Dei.

NEWS
Place in the Church
Opus Dei's work of spiritual formation complements the work of local churches. People who join Opus Dei or attend its activities continue to belong to their local dioceses.

Harambee's Awards for Videos on Africa
The winner of the 2nd edition of "Awards for Videos on Africa" are: -"Alaoma -Land of beauty and splendour" by Gabriel Otonoku, Nigeria - Prize for African production and "When you say four thousand goobyes" by Jim Fahy, Ireland - Prize for non African production.

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Each December, I vowed to make Christmas a calm and peaceful experience. I had cut back on nonessential obligations -- extensive card writing, endless baking, decorating, and even overspending. Yet still, I found myself exhausted, unable to appreciate the precious family moments, and of course, the true meaning of Christmas.

My son, Nicholas, was in kindergarten that year. It was an exciting season for a six-year-old. For weeks, he'd been memorizing songs for his school's "Winter Pageant."

I didn't have the heart to tell him I'd be working the night of the production. Unwilling to miss his shining moment, I spoke with his teacher. She assured me there'd be a dress rehearsal the morning of the presentation. All parents unable to attend that evening were welcome to come then. Fortunately, Nicholas seemed happy with the compromise.

So, the morning of the dress rehearsal, I filed in ten minutes early, found a spot on the cafeteria floor and sat down. Around the room, I saw several other parents quietly scampering to their seats. As I waited, the students were led into the room. Each class, accompanied by their teacher, sat cross-legged on the floor. Then, each group, one by one, rose to perform their song.

Because the public school system had long stopped referring to the holiday as Christmas," I didn't expect anything other than fun, commercial entertainment - songs of reindeer, Santa Claus, snowflakes and good cheer. So, when my son's class rose to sing, "Christmas Love," I was slightly taken aback by its bold title.

Nicholas was aglow, as were all of his classmates, adorned in fuzzy mittens, red sweaters, and bright snowcaps upon their heads. Those in the front row-center stage -- held up large letters, one by one, to spell out the title of the song. As the class would sing, "C is for Christmas," a child would hold up the letter C. Then, "H is for Happy," and on and on, until each child holding up his portion had presented the complete message, "Christmas Love."

The performance was going smoothly, until suddenly, we noticed her; a small, quiet, girl in the front row holding the letter "M" upside down -- totally unaware her letter "M" appeared as a "W."

The audience of 1st through 6th graders snickered at this little one's mistake. But she had no idea they were laughing at her, so she stood tall, proudly holding her "W." Although many teachers tried to shush the children, the laughter continued until the last letter was raised, and we all saw it together. A hush came over the audience and eyes began to widen. In that instant, we understood the reason we were there, why we celebrated the holiday in the first place, why even in the chaos, there was a purpose for our festivities.

For when the last letter was held high, the message read loud and clear: "C H R I S T W A S L O V E"
And, I believe, He still is.

We are amazed in His presence... Humbled by His love.
May each of you have a happy and holy Christmas as you reflect on His Amazing Love

Editors Note: CORRECTION: WALMART USA, NOT WALMART CANADA OFFERING GAY TEEN MANUAL http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2006/nov/06111603.html

Wal-Mart Hits Teens with Gay Porn How-To Manual
http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2006/nov/06111507.html

Wal-Mart Contributes 5% Of Online Sales To Homosexual Group
http://www.afa.net/walmartpetition.asp

If you think this e-mail sounds like urban legend stuff...just watch the video.

God Bless,
Dan

Strongest Dad in the World
[From Sports Illustrated, By Rick Reilly; edited slightly by me!]

I try to be a good father. Give my kids mulligans. Work nights to pay for their text messaging. Take them to photo shoots. But compared with Dick Hoyt, I'm pathetic.

Eighty-five times he's pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in marathons. Eight times he's not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day. Dick's also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. on a bike. Makes taking your son bowling look a little lame, right? And what has Rick done for his father? Not much--except save his life.

This love story began in Winchester , Mass. 43 years ago, when Rick was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him brain-damaged and unable to control his limbs. "He'll be a vegetable the rest of his life;'' Dick says doctors told him and his wife, Judy, when Rick was nine months old. "Put him in an institution.''

But the Hoyts weren't buying it. They noticed the way Rick's eyes followed them around the room. When Rick was 11 they took him to the engineering department at Tufts University and asked if there was anything to help the boy communicate. "No way,'' Dick says he was told. "There's nothing going on in his brain.''

"Tell him a joke,'' Dick countered. They did. Rick laughed. Turns out a lot was going on in his brain.

Rigged up with a computer that allowed him to control the cursor by touching a switch with the side of his head, Rick was finally able to communicate. First words? "Go Bruins!" And after a high school classmate was paralyzed in an accident and the school organized a charity run for him, Rick pecked out, "Dad, I want to do that." Yeah, right. How was Dick, a self-described "porker" who never ran more than a mile at a time, going to push his son five miles?

Still, he tried. "Then it was me who was handicapped,'' Dick says. "I was sore for two weeks.''

That day changed Rick's life. "Dad,'' he typed, "when we were running, it felt like I wasn't disabled anymore!''

And that sentence changed Dick's life. He became obsessed with giving Rick that feeling as often as he could. He got into such hard-belly shape that he and Rick were ready to try the 1979 Boston Marathon.

"No way,'' Dick was told by a race official. The Hoyts weren't quite a single runner, and they weren't quite a wheelchair competitor.

For a few years Dick and Rick just joined the massive field and ran anyway, then they found a way to get into the race officially: In 1983 they ran another marathon so fast they made the qualifying time for Boston the following year.

Then somebody said, "Hey, Dick, why not a triathlon?'' How's a guy who never learned to swim and hadn't ridden a bike since he was six going to haul his 110-pound kid through a triathlon?

Still, Dick tried.

Now they've done 212 triathlons, including four grueling 15-hour Ironmans in Hawaii . It must be a buzzkill to be a 25-year-old stud getting passed by an old guy towing a grown man in a dinghy don't you think?

Hey, Dick, why not see how you'd do on your own? "No way,'' he says. Dick does it purely for "the awesome feeling'' he gets seeing Rick with a cantaloupe smile as they run, swim and ride together.

This year, at ages 65 and 43, Dick and Rick finished their 24th Boston Marathon , in 5,083rd place out of more than 20,000 starters.

Their best time'? Two hours, 40 minutes in 1992--only 35 minutes off the world record, which, in case you don't keep track of these things, happens to be held by a guy who was not pushing another man in a wheelchair at the time.

"No question about it,'' Rick types. "My dad is the Father of the Century.''

And Dick got something else out of all this too. Two years ago he had a mild heart attack during a race. Doctors found that one of his arteries was 95% clogged. "If you hadn't been in such great shape,'' one doctor told him, "you probably would've died 15 years ago.''

So, in a way, Dick and Rick saved each other's life.

Rick, who has his own apartment (he gets home care) and works in Boston and Dick, retired from the military and living in Holland , Mass always find ways to be together. They give speeches around the country and compete in some backbreaking race every weekend, including this Father's Day. That night, Rick will buy his dad dinner, but the thing he really wants to give him is a gift he can never buy. "The thing I'd most like,'' Rick types, "is that my dad sit in the chair and I push him once.''

Here's the video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryCTIigaloQ

Don't Worry, We're Going To Do Something

I was listening to an archived broadcast from EWTN recently - the broadcast being an interview from "The World Over" with the widow of one of the Flight 93 heroes of September 11th. The widow's name was Deena Burnett - her deceased husband's name was Tom (Burnett) - and Tom was one of the leaders attempting to retake the plane from the terrorists, who had planned to crash it into the White House or Capital Hill. Tom and Deena's family consisted of three little girls: a set of twins - 5 years old at the time - and a three year old.

Deena herself was a convert to Catholicism - she was born a Baptist. She had grown up with a "judgmental" view of God, she said, and found the Catholicism she embraced at marriage gave a more merciful face to the God she was raised with. One day, about a year before Tom died, he said to her, "Deena, I want you to know that I've been going to daily Mass at noon for several months now." For Tom, making such a statement was "out of character," since, while he was a religious man, he never spoke about his faith unless asked. Noticing this peculiarity, Deena asked, "Tom, why?" He said, "because I feel God is trying to tell me something." Listening intently, she asked, "Do you have any idea what it is?" He answered: "I feel that if I spend more time in prayer and more time in God's presence in church I'll know more clearly what it is, but I know that it will have a great impact on a number of people and it has something to do with the White House."

This was not the first premonition of events to come. Two years before this conversation, when her third child was born, Deena's mother came to visit her at the hospital. Her mother, on observing her new granddaughter said, "I guess you'll just have to have a fourth child, Deena, so Tom can have a son." Deena responded, without reflecting on her words, "no Mom, God isn't going to give us a son. Her mother asked, "and why won't God give you a son?" "Because Tom won't be here to raise his children, and I wouldn't be able to raise his son alone." Her startled mother asked: "Deena, what are you saying?" She answered, "Mom, I've always had the feeling that Tom was going to be in a plane crash." At this, her mother became alarmed and said nothing more. Deena herself was startled at what she had just said, but at the same time felt a peace envelop her with a sense that everything was going to be ok. Three years later, on the morning of the crash, her mother came to visit her at her home, and asked: "do you remember our conversation at the hospital that day?" "Yes, Mom, I remember it," she answered.

At this point of the interview, the interviewer made reference to the "mysterious premonitions…almost prophecies" Deena had received. For her part, Deena spoke of these, rather, as "grace filled moments preparing us for what was to come.

In many ways, Deena's hospital conversation with her mother - in the presence of a newborn - was similar in context to that which was witnessed at Jesus own circumcision: Simeon prophesied that Jesus was to be a "sign of contradiction," and that Mary would "suffer much." Deena herself "suffered much" in the days and months following the crash, but in her own words, the morning after the crash, when she felt almost paralyzed in bed, she realized she still had a purpose to fulfill. She had three little girls to raise. So she got out of bed and onto her knees, where she begged God for strength to help her raise her little girls. The Lord, she said, has not let her down. Her girls are happy and healthy, and know that their father was a hero. Deena herself discovered she has a gift for public speaking, and out of her husband's tragedy - ironically - she has encouraged millions with his last words spoken to her on this earth: "Don't worry, we're going to do something." In Tom's words and actions, said Deena, he's taught us that we all have a role to play - something to do to make a difference. Are we ready?

The reflection below is probably the best commentary I have read re: the Sept 12th Regensburg address by the Holy Father. Although the "heat" seems off for now, the points made below are clear and worth putting to memory. (Note: It's a bit lengthy)

God Bless, Dan

----- Original Message -----
From: "Fr. Joseph Devereaux"
Subject: Is Dialogue With Islam Possible?
Some Reflections on Pope Benedict XVI's Address at the University of Regensburg

http://www.ignatiusinsight.com/features2006/jfessio_reflections_sept06.asp

For example, in Deus Caritas Est, Benedict does not address directly the controversial issues of homosexual partners, promiscuity, or divorce. Instead he examines the "inner logic" of the love of eros, which is "love between man and woman, where body and soul are inseparably joined . . .”

He shows that it has been understood historically to have a relationship with the divine ("love promises infinity, eternity") and to require "purification and growth in maturity ... through the path of renunciation". In love's "growth towards higher levels and inward purification ... it seeks to become definitive ... both in the sense of exclusivity (this particular person alone) and in the sense of being 'for ever'."

So starting from the "inner logic" of the fundamental reality of love, Benedict concludes to an exclusive and permanent relationship between a man and a woman. That is a fair description of the Catholic idea of marriage, and it excludes homosexual partners, promiscuity, and divorce.

Incidentally, in the very first paragraph of this encyclical, Benedict states: "In a world where the name of God is sometimes associated with vengeance or even a duty of hatred and violence, this message [that God is love] is both timely and significant." Clearly the religious justification of violence is an aberration that's on his mind.

II. While in Deus Caritas Est Benedict defends the foundational truth that God is Love, in his Regensburg lecture he is defending the foundational truth that God is Logos, Reason. The central theme of the lecture is that the Christian conviction that God is Logos is not simply the result of a contingent historical process of enculturation that has been called the "hellenization of Christianity". Rather it is something that is "always and intrinsically true".

In the main body of the lecture, Benedict criticizes attempts in the West to "dehellenize" Christianity: the rejection of the rational component of faith (the sola fides of the 16th century reformers); the reduction of reason to the merely empirical or historical (modern exegesis and modern science); a multiculturalism which regards the union of faith and reason as merely one possible form of enculturation of the faith. All this is a Western self-critique.

But as the starting point of his lecture, Benedict takes a 14th century dialogue between the Byzantine Emperor and a learned Muslim to focus on the central question of the entire lecture: whether God is Logos. The Emperor's objection to Islam is Mohammed's "command to spread by the sword the faith he preached". The emperor asserts that this is not in accordance with right reason, and "not acting reasonably is contrary to God's nature". Benedict points to this as "the decisive statement in this argument against violent conversion".

It is at this point in the lecture that Benedict makes a statement, which cannot be avoided or evaded if there is ever to be any dialogue between Christianity and Islam that is more than empty words and diplomatic gestures. For the Emperor, God's rationality is "self-evident". But for Muslim teaching, according to the editor of the book from which Benedict has been quoting, "God is absolutely transcendent. His will is not bound up with any of our categories, even that of rationality".

Benedict has struck bedrock. This is the challenge to Islam. This is the issue that lies beneath all the rest. If God is above reason in this way, then it is useless to employ rational arguments against (or for) forced conversion, terrorism, or Sharia law, which calls for the execution of Muslim converts to Christianity. If God wills it, it is beyond discussion.

III. Let us now turn to the statement in Benedict's lecture, which has aroused the most anger. Benedict quotes the Byzantine Emperor's challenge to the learned Muslim: "Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached."

Benedict's main argument -- that God is Logos and that violence in spreading or defending religion is contrary to the divine nature – could have been made without including that part of Emperor's remark made "somewhat brusquely" according to Benedict) that challenges Islam much more globally. And in his Angelus message the following Sunday, Benedict said: "These (words) were in fact a quotation from a Medieval text which do not in any way express my personal thought." Nevertheless, it may be instructive to examine this "brusque" utterance of the Emperor and ask the question: Is it simply indefensible?

As a thought experiment, let's reverse the situation. Suppose a major spokesman for Islam publicly issued the challenge: "Show me just what Jesus brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman." What would be the Christian response? Not to burn a mosque or an effigy of the Muslim spokesman, or to shoot a Muslim nurse in the back in Somalia. It would rather be to reply with some examples of just what makes the New Covenant new: the revelation that God is a Father who has a co-equal Son and Holy Spirit; that Jesus is God's Son made flesh; the Sermon on the Mount; the Resurrection of the body; the list would be long. As Irenaeus put it: he brought all newness, bringing himself. Such a statement would not make dialogue impossible; it would be an occasion for dialogue.

There is obviously much room for qualification in the Emperor's blunt statement, even for a Christian who holds that Mohammed was not a prophet, and that whatever is good in Islam is traceable either to man's natural religious knowledge or to conscious or unconscious borrowings from Jewish and Christian revelation.

Yet there is a crucial underlying principle that needs to be enunciated.
Christianity and Islam make incompatible truth claims. Despite the difficulty in determining who can speak authoritatively for Christianity or for Islam, there are elements of belief common to all Christians, which are incompatible with elements of belief common to all Muslims. The two most obvious and most fundamental are the Trinity and the Incarnation.

I would expect an intelligent and informed Muslim to consider me a blasphemer (because I introduce multiplicity into the one God) and an
idolator (because I worship as God a man named Jesus). Should I be offended if he says so publicly? Should I not rather be offended if he conceals his position for the alleged purpose of fostering dialogue?

The question of respect is entirely distinct. Benedict is clearly aware of this distinction as evidenced in the official Vatican statement subsequent to Benedict's lecture, where the Secretary of State refers to his "respect and esteem for those who profess Islam". That is, one can and should respect Muslims (those who profess Islam) as persons with inherent dignity; but where there are incompatible truth claims, they cannot be simultaneously true. One cannot hold one as true without holding the other as false. Any religious dialogue should begin by examining the evidence for the incompatible claims.

It's worth noting, however, that while consistent Christians and Muslims in fact hold the position of the other to be erroneous in important ways, the Christian is not obliged by his faith to subject the Muslim to dhimmitude nor to deny him his religious freedom. There is a serious asymmetry here, which Benedict has criticized before. The Saudis can build a multi-million dollar mosque in Rome; but Christians can be arrested in Saudi Arabia for possessing a Bible.

Certainly, it may sound provocative to make the claim the Emperor did. But why (since Christians believe that God's full and definitive revelation has come with Christ, who brings all prophecy to an end) isn't it just as provocative for a Muslim to proclaim that Mohammed is a new prophet, bringing new revelation that corrects and supplements that of Christ?

Is it really offensive to say that Christians and Muslims disagree profoundly about this? Is not this the necessary starting point that must be recognized before any religious dialogue can even begin?

And if the response from Islam is violence, then must we not ask precisely the question raised by Benedict: Is this violence an aberration that is inconsistent with genuine Islam (as similar violence by Christians would be an aberration inconsistent with genuine Christianity)? Or is it justifiable on the basis of Islam's image of God as absolutely transcending all human categories, even that of rationality? And if the response to this question is violence, then the question has been answered existentially, and rational dialogue has been repudiated.

IV. Finally, has no one seen the irony in the episode related by Benedict? Byzantium was increasingly threatened in the 14th century by an aggressive Islamic force, the growing Ottoman Empire. The Byzantine Emperor seems to have committed the dialogue to writing while his imperial capital, Constantinople, was under siege by the Ottoman Turks. It would fall definitively in 1453. Muslims were military enemies, engaged in a war of aggression against Byzantium. Yet even in these circumstances the Christian Emperor and the learned Persian Muslim could be utterly candid with one another and discuss civilly their fundamental religious differences. As Benedict described the dialogue, the subject was "Christianity and Islam, and the truth of both".

The West is once again under siege. Doubly so because in addition to terrorist attacks there is a new form of conquest: immigration coupled with high fertility. Let us hope that, following the Holy Father's courageous example in these troubled times, there can be a dialogue whose subject is the truth claims of Christianity and Islam.

Men's Breakfast at St Augustine's Sept 23 8:00 AM

Hello Men

I hope you all have had a great summer, a time to be renewed in body, mind and spirit. To continue and aid that renewal of spirit we are starting our Men’s Breakfasts at St. Augustine’s with a talk by Chris Currie on our call be holy, holy as Christian men, as holy as husbands and as holy as fathers. We hope you will come out and support this event and invite another man to come alone with you. If this is the first time your invited guest has come to a men’s breakfast at St. Augustine’s your breakfast will be free. This talk will be appropriate even for the men that are not married or are yet to be married, as we are all called to be holy so invite some younger men.

Location: St. Augustine’s Church
at the corner of Merivale and Baseline
Date: Saturday September 23, 2006
Time: 8:00 AM, to 10:00 AM
Cost: $4.00 at the door or $3.00 if you call me or send me a return email to let me know you are coming.
Contact; tom.gleeson@sympatico.ca

God Bless you and see you at the breakfast.

THE former Archbishop of Canterbury Lord Carey of Clifton has issued his own challenge to "violent" Islam in a lecture in which he defends the Pope's "extraordinarily effective and lucid" speech. Lord Carey said that Muslims must address "with great urgency" their religion's association with violence. He made it clear that he believed the "clash of civilisations" endangering the world was not between Islamist extremists and the West, but with Islam as a whole.

"We are living in dangerous and potentially cataclysmic times," he said. "There will be no significant material and economic progress [in Muslim communities] until the Muslim mind is allowed to challenge the status quo of Muslim conventions and even their most cherished shibboleths."

Lord Carey's address came as the man who shot and wounded the last Pope wrote to Pope Benedict XVI to warn him that he was in danger. Mehmet Ali Agca, the Turkish gunman who tried to murder John Paul II in 1981 and is now in prison in Turkey, urged the Pope not to visit the country in November.

"I write as one who knows about these matters very well," Agca said. "Your life is in danger. Don't come to Turkey - absolutely not!"

Since the Pope quoted a Byzantine emperor as saying that the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad were "evil and inhuman", a nun has been shot dead, a terrorist group linked to al-Qaeda has vowed to kill the Pope, churches in Palestinian areas have been attacked and security at churches and mosques in London and elsewhere has been stepped up.

This morning the Pope, who has already apologised for the offence caused by his words and distanced himself from the sentiments of the Byzantine emperor Manuel II Paleologus, will elaborate further on what he intended by last week's address at Regensburg University in Germany.

At his weekly audience at the Vatican the Pope is expected to emphasise the dangers of violence and fundamentalism in all religions, not just Islam, and reiterate his call for a dialogue of faiths based on "mutual respect". The pontiff will explain why he has been misunderstood", Vatican sources said.

Lord Carey, who as Archbishop of Canterbury became a pioneer in Christian-Muslim dialogue, himself quoted a contemporary political scientist, Samuel Huntington, who has said the world is witnessing a "clash of civilisations".

Arguing that Huntington's thesis has some "validity", Lord Carey quoted him as saying: "Islam's borders are bloody and so are its innards. The fundamental problem for the West is not Islamic fundamentalism. It is Islam, a different civilisation whose people are convinced of the superiority of their culture and are obsessed with the inferiority of their power."

Lord Carey went on to argue that a "deep-seated Westophobia" has developed in recent years in the Muslim world.

Lord Carey was delivering a lecture titled The Cross and the Crescent: The Clash of Faiths in an Age of Secularism, at Newbold College, Berkshire.

Lord Carey, who has continued to work in interfaith collaboration since his retirement in 2002, said that the relationship between Islamic countries and the West was "the most dangerous, most important and potentially cataclysmic issue of our day." He described the two civilisations as "polarised and uncomprehending" and said that the Danish cartoons controversy last March showed "two world views colliding in public space with no common point of reference".

He said the West had been largely responsible for "redrawing the map of the Middle East" and it was the "moral relativism of the West" that has outraged Muslim society. Most Muslims believe firmly that the invasion of Iraq is 2004 was solely about oil, he said.

He went on to defend the Pope's fundamental thesis, that reason and religious faith can be compatible. "The actual essay is an extraordinarily effective and lucid thesis exploring the weakness of secularism and the way that faith and reason go hand in hand," he said.

He said he agreed with his Muslim friends who claimed that true Islam is not a violent religion, but he wanted to know why Islam today had become associated with violence. "The Muslim world must address this matter with great urgency," he said.

From One Prisoner to Another

This past weekend I felt a strong sense that the Lord was telling me to be on “house arrest” again – only this time in Ottawa – and not with my family in Barry’s Bay. I usually get this “house arrest” sense when I go to phone a friend (or family member), and something inside me says, “no, not now.” Well this “not now” prompting happened three times on Saturday morning, and was followed up in identical fashion on Sunday. This led me to inwardly say: “Lord, you must have a reason for this, whatever it is.” One such “whatever” may have been the Twin Towers 9/11 Anniversary – which was two days away. Another such “whatever” was that our pastor at St. George’s, Fr. Leonard St. John, was preaching on the great need of our parish for volunteers to fill up essential ministries (of every description). The Lord, in typical fashion, however, was not letting me know whether these indeed were part of the “whys.”

In my experiences of other “house arrest” situations, however, I have found that the Lord doesn’t leave me completely in the dark. He usually reveals little “snapshots” of his purpose as I “enter into” the silence of the occasion. I should note that my use of the term “house arrest” doesn’t mean I “stay inside” the whole weekend – it just means I don’t plan any activities with friends or family. The result is I am allowed time not only for deeper prayer, but also “putting in order” some bigger items on my “to do list.” This has the effect of unburdening my spirit considerably, and prepares me for handling future obligations / demands with much greater patience.

On the prayer side, this past weekend saw the Lord teaching me through a couple of teachings from John Paul II. For reasons of space, however, I’ll just mention one these teachings here. It concerns God’s merciful justice particularly demonstrated in the Cain and Abel story. The Holy Father remarked that while God didn’t leave Cain unpunished – he sent him into exile - He also made sure he was protected by placing a “mark” on him – lest anyone should kill him at sight.”(Gn 4:15) In short, said John Paul, “God showed He preferred the correction rather than the death of a sinner.”

Now, this last point really caught my attention, because I had just read (a day earlier) an updated story about a local murderer. The “Cain” in question was the Gatineau man with the “gun tattoos” on his face. As you may recall, he and a 16 year old killed two retired Ottawa teachers at point blank range in their cottage north of Ottawa two years ago. Now, this Mr. Mauvais had appealed to the crown to have his life sentence reduced, but was rejected. My first thoughts were, “thank God, that jerk…”

Anyway, as I was piously reading the words of the Holy Father a day later, I sensed the Lord tapping my conscience: “Dan, remember this fellow you read about? I want you to let go of your revulsion for him. I know he’s done something terrible, but I do not wish him to die anymore than I did Cain. I want you to forgive him and pray for him.” I thought, “my, uhh, Lord, …he’s uhh… still a child of God, isn’t he, and…how uhh, will he ever receive real correction if no-one prays for him or tells him about You, or shows him real love?”

… From what I also recall, the man was bounced around a lot of foster homes as a child, so he’s probably never received consistent guidance or discipline from a loving father. So I thought, “yes, I can at least pray for this man.” And perhaps this is one reason why the Lord put me under “house arrest” for a couple of days – so I might get in touch – spiritually at least - with someone else who was really under arrest.

God’s House Arrest

I just got back from spending the Labour Day weekend with my parents and a few relatives. We spent it at the family cottage in Barry’s Bay. There were a few chores to take care of with my Dad (put the boat away for the season; trim a few trees), and plenty of time to tell Mom how great her pie / cookies were in between the small and big talk. Truth be known, my visits to my parents have become a monthly ritual of sorts. Yes, part of the reason is that they’re getting on in years, and part is the 4th commandment call to “honor them” (Ex 20:12), but the primary reason for any “specific” visit is always a prayerful “sense” that it is “required.” From my parents’ perspective, they would be happier if I could visit them more than once a month – every 2nd weekend, if possible. The odd time I do, but more frequently I hear the Lord saying “no, not this weekend.” I’m sure He has His reasons. No doubt He wants my parents to learn to lean more on Him than me (or my siblings), and no doubt He has something planned for me which requires my presence elsewhere. In any case, I try and obey what I hear (from Him).

Now, on those weekends I actually spend with my parents, there can be certain tensions. For me, one tension is that Saturday morning Mass time intersects with the usual “breakfast time” at the cottage. My Dad appreciates Sunday Mass, but doesn’t understand my “need” to attend on weekdays. He would rather have me sitting at breakfast with him than (have me) sitting in church on a Saturday morning. He’s never put it into those words, exactly, but that’s the message he sends. I’ve adapted somewhat by scooting home quickly after Mass and catching the tail end of any family table conversation – which tends to be most civil and serious at breakfast (before the nieces and nephews wake up). I then “catch up” in a quiet place (the cottage deck or back yard) on any unfinished personal prayer time I didn’t complete before Mass.

Another “at the cottage” tension (for me) usually occurs after lunch. It involves deciding whether to spend time just “hanging around” the property (with family & relatives), or doing some exploring on my own (i.e. Algonquin Park; Madonna House, friends I know in the area). In the past I’d often take this liberty in exploring / visiting most afternoons – making sure I returned for supper and evening when the gang would party it up. For the past couple of years, however, I’ve sensed the Lord telling me to “stay put.” Be still, so to speak. It’s as if He’s saying:

“I want you to spend more time just being with your family…it’s not necessary that you participate in every single activity with them…but it is important that you be here with them.”

For me, this mild form of “house arrest” requires some sacrifice and letting go. I say “mild” because I can still have a beer, share a laugh and take a swim – I just can’t take that swim anywhere or have that beer with whomever I want. Yet, to my surprise, I’ve found that “contentment muscles” actually do form, and that God’s grace is, well, “sufficient.” Furthermore, as I “get into it” the Lord seems to be saying it’s still OK to consider the odd “mini-adventure,” but that I always “check in” for approval first.

In some ways, finding my new “identity” when visiting my parents and family reminds me of what Catharine Doherty used to tell priests who came to join Madonna House. Those priests, before arriving, carried heavy responsibilities in their former lives. Then, after arrival, they would have little – initially - to do. So they would ask: “what am I supposed to do here? How can I help?” She would always answer, “How can you help? …With your presence, Father.”

This “presence” word – adapted to my circumstance - has taken some getting used to. But I can honestly say I’m already beginning to see some fruit: Family relationships are getting stronger, and one family member, in particular is showing a side of faith and generosity I’ve never witnessed before. Thank the Lord …for “house arrest!”

Last Minute Miracles

Recently I attended a Companion’s Anniversary Reception at St. Maurice Church in Ottawa – which was celebrating those CC’s who had served 5, 10 and 20 years in the priesthood. The reception cost $15 and was sold out ahead of time. I hadn’t purchased a ticket but decided to at least attend the Mass and offer a quick “congratulations” to some of the men I knew before heading home. I also particularly wanted to speak to Fr. Frankovich, who I bumped into the day before. He asked me to “come early to the Mass and grab him in the sacristy” – so that we might catch up on what the Lord has been doing in each of our lives.

For those who don’t know, I was once a CC’ seminarian and Fr. Frankovich was my supervisor during my year of “parish internship” at St. Mary’s. I learned to really admire him there, particularly his blend of courage mixed with gentleness. As it turned out, however, on this particular night the good father was late for Mass, so I didn’t get a chance to see him ahead of time.

Furthermore, after Mass I half-decided to “just head home” since Fr. Frankovich would probably be mobbed in the “ticket only” reception area. On my way out the door, however, I exchanged greetings with Gary and Margaret-Ann Mellor – who asked if I was attending the reception. I said no, I wasn’t able to get a ticket. About five seconds later, however, a woman handed Margaret-Ann a ticket and said, “can you give this to someone? I came with a friend and we were only able to get one ticket, so we’re leaving.” Margaret-Ann quickly turned around and “handed-off” the ticket to me! Suddenly I was “in the reception.” Needless to say, it was a blessed evening. And I did get to “catch up” with Fr. Frankovich.

The odd thing is I had asked the Lord about a week earlier if he wanted me to attend this evening – since there was a prayer meeting I regularly attended nearby the same night. The answer I heard in prayer was “don’t buy a ticket.” For me, I thought, OK…you know best, Lord. Besides, I’ve been laid off from my work the past month – so I have to learn to practice responsible stewardship. But then I ran into Fr. Frankovich, who said, “come to the Mass…anybody (not even ticket holders) can come to the Mass.” To that I thought, “yes, and I’m sure there’ll be a good homily and worship music as well.” So to the Mass I went… and… at the last minute… to the reception I went - sipping champagne with the best of them! “How blessed I am,” I thought to be enrolled in Our Lord’s “Last Minute Club!”

The irony of my story is that the night before, I heard from two friends who recounted how they “needed tickets immediately” to return to Canada from Ireland where they were vacationing. Unbeknownst to them, they showed up at the airport a day later than their actual flight date. Upon arrival, the agent said: “You’ll have to pay $3000 to come home...you’ll have to fly first class as there are no economy seats left.“ Somewhat aghast, they asked: can we fly stand-by?” The agent said, “finding two standby tickets is next to impossible, but, if something comes available - yes, you can.” They answered: we’ll pray a rosary and be back in 15 minutes.” Fifteen minutes later they returned to a shocked attendant who said: “you must believe in miracles, we’ve just had two last-minute cancellations!” Ten minutes and $300 later they were on the plane. Thanks to Our Lady - and Our Lord’s – Last Minute Club. (It’s nice to know that when we “miss the boat / plane,” the Lord still has the matter in hand).

http://www.zenit.org/english/visualizza.phtml?sid=93878

I'm forwarding an edited (for the sales drive pitch) e-letter here with some interesting comments...good to take to heart. God Bless, Dan

----- Original Message -----
From: Brian Saint-Paul
The Foot In My Mouth
Crisis Magazine e-Letter
August 22, 2006
********************************************************
Dear Friend,
I need to correct an item from my last e-Letter.

Sometimes I come up with a line that sounds cute and clever at first, but upon further reflection, is actually kind of dumb. In my last e-Letter, I opened with one of those lines. Here's what I said: "Faithful Catholics start families. Dissenting Catholics start organizations."

The fact is, plenty of faithful Catholics start organizations and apostolates (and, to be fair, plenty of dissenting Catholics start families as well). While it's true that dissenting groups seem to be popping up left and right, it's also true that good Catholics should be open to the call to start something themselves. Patrick Reilly, a friend, a family man, and the president of the Cardinal Newman Society, made this point in an email to me:

"One could probably make a strong argument that, if only everything were right with the Church -- if its leadership, institutions (especially its schools and colleges), and parents were effectively spreading the Gospel message and bringing people to Christ while handing down the Faith to new generations -- an inclination to establish an independent, lay-run organization without direct supervision by the Church might only come from dissidents. But such is not the case today, and I am quite certain that the Holy Spirit is actively calling faithful Catholic men and women to serve the Church in a unique way that involves much personal suffering: as leaders of apostolates to renew the Church where human nature has caused it to become stale or even sinful."

He's right on the money. In a time of ecclesial weakness, faithful Catholics need to pick up the slack. Indeed, one sign of the current renewal in the Catholic Church is the growing number of solid Catholic organizations. May they multiply.

All right, that's it for now. Next week, I'm going to send you the latest instalment of our popular "Crisis Magazine Reading recommendations." In the meantime, take advantage of that $10 subscription offer before time runs out.

Here's the link again: https://www.ezsubscription.com/cri/sub.htm

Talk to you next week, Brian

Greetings Bros. & Sisters;

Great article here on the history of the "New Pentecost" which took place in Protestant churches at the beginning of the last century. I first heard about this "revival" from Fr. Francis Martin, a regular priest/speaker at Univ. of Steubenville.
God Bless, Dan

The message is ready to be sent with the following file or link attachments: Shortcut to: http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/usnews/060424a.aspx

Believe it or not...the local imam of (I believe Scott St.) has agreed to help St. Brigid's in their fund-raising efforts. A gentleman named Mark K. (who works with some St. Brigid's parishioners who I know) approached the imam (on his own - it was his idea) to ask him if he would like to help them in their fund-raising. He agreed, and has signed on eight ladies of his mosque who are asking: "how can we help."

No Joke, Praise the Lord!

Dan

Nightmare Days, Anyone?

Everyone has a bad day every once in a while…and then there are nightmare days – a Calvary kind of day that comes along only very occasionally. I had one such day recently. It was a Friday, and a work related “misunder-standing,” in which I got another person very upset, and they upset me. To be fair, part of the blame rested with me, due to my “lack of experience and foresight” in part of what I was asked to do. I did, however, sort my way through this “part” soon enough, but my “soon” was still not “enough” for the other. Even though I’d “come up to speed,” the other did not believe me, nor have the tools to confirm that I had. The end result was I went home feeling completely deflated and humiliated, wondering if this “day” was a little something extra the Lord was asking of me. In any case, I “offered it up.” The next day, while at St. George’s Parish where I was working on the accounting books there, I got a phone call from a parishioner who asked, “Have you heard the news? Seventeen terrorists have been arrested in Toronto, and they were planning on hitting some targets in Ontario.” Coincidence, I said to myself? “Perhaps not.”

The very next day, at Mass, I overheard a major smear campaign against a “potential lay minister” of a particular parish. I happened to know the intended “target” of the smear. I knew the person wasn’t perfect, but not nearly as dark as painted by a certain group of “concerned faithful” to the pastor. When the suitable moment arose, I too approached the pastor and tried to offer a counter-balance for the unfair accusations I had overheard. I also recommended he speak with three other parishioners who knew the “accused” and whom I felt could offer a more objective character “appraisal” than what he’d just heard. This second event made me think that Friday’s cross (and it was a First Friday) probably was to be my “call to arms” in the “spiritual war effort” needed to battle these two injustices.

In the end, I am continuing to learn that “all things work together for good,” (Rom 8) as long as I keep trusting that – when the cross presses in - Jesus is still with me. This isn’t easy to do. The natural thing - resisting and even resenting the cross, only adds to its weight and prolongs the amount of time I have to spend carrying it. And when I do this I’m much like an injured child who won’t keep still so a “foreign object” can be removed - the thrashing around only prolongs my misery and prevents any real healing from beginning. For us adults, our “keeping still” and willingness to accept the surgeon’s touch represents the “openness of heart” necessary which prepares the way for experiencing real resurrection on the Lord’s timetable – rather than days or years later when we settle down to finally accepting and even embracing the cross. In my case, the evening after the nightmare day above, I kept repeating from Psalm 119v71: “It was good for me to be afflicted,” even though it didn’t feel like it. I also went to an icon of Our Lady the next day – resting my head against her image – and said: “I’m not leaving until you give me your blessing.” After about a minute of waiting, she did: I felt a major chunk of the heaviness leave me. Later, I felt the “temptation” to brood return, and did some “talking out loud” of the situation, but now, at least, I knew I had the “choice” of whether I wanted my thoughts to be dominated by the nightmare day’s residue, or not. Largely, the brooding was about pride: the “I was largely right,” card. So I decided again to let it go.

The next day was Pentecost Sunday, and the Holy Spirit showed me in no small measure that He was both “teacher” and “advocate.” He gave me an abiding joy, for starters. Then He gave me a sunny day and the free time to enjoy it (cycling, skipping upon an outdoor art show) – and a “late in the day” unexpected supper invitation. Last, and most importantly, He gave me a new inner sense of what “needed to be done” regarding “little things” which could “make a difference” around the parish (eg. bringing drinks to Knights volunteers working at our “rain day” neighbourhood garage sale). On the more spiritual side, I was also given a major consolation in the biography of St. Marie of the Incarnation, who experienced major trials herself in managing her sister and brother-in-law’s business before she headed from France for the New World …trials the Lord put to good use when she had to deal with many business people in the establishment of the Ursuline Sisters of Quebec. Like the parable with the “twelve bushels left over,” the Lord was showing me that in Him, nothing is wasted…especially not the nightmare days.

Opus Dei Misconceptions

Today I will attempt to shed light on a couple of the popular myths surrounding Opus Dei, specifically, their perception as being “secretive and elitist.” My primary source will be John Allen Jr.’s book “Opus Dei: An Objective Look Behind the Myths and Reality of the Most Controversial Force in The Catholic Church.” I will also add some personal observations in response to what I have learned from reading a few Opus Dei books and attending a number of their monthly recollections.

Misconception #1: “Secretive.”

During the last U.S. election, both President Bush and contender John Kerry were asked: “Are you members of the Skull & Bones Society?” Each answered: “I can’t answer that.” John Allen contrasted these responses by noting that every person he asked about their “membership” and “activities” in Opus Dei was answered straightforwardly. He was also given access to all of their books, libraries and financial information.

This openness has been an evolution of sorts in Opus Dei. The early years of Opus Dei, in Spain during and after the Civil War, when many a member (and the founder) were accused of heresy, obliged members to “speak cautiously to outsiders.” (A directive found in the 1950 “Statutes” of the Prelature). The 1982 “Statutes,” on the other hand, prohibited “secrecy or clandestine activity” and said members are to act with naturalness, but “without hiding that they belong to the Prelature.” (Allen, p. 143)

(It should be noted, however that Fr. James Martin, a Jesuit writing in the early 90’s was not shown Opus Dei’s constitutions when asked, indicating a defensive position. The irony of the situation was that an english translation (of the Latin originals) of the constitutions was published in Opus Dei-affiliated Midwest Theological Forum before Martin’s article came out in the Jesuit Magazine “America.” Opus Dei, for its part, told John Allen that some essential terminological questions have not yet been settled in canon law (ibid, p. 153) (…hence the (unmentioned) defensiveness).

Misconception #2: Elitist.

I recall the founder (Escriva) in one of his books saying:

“If the Church’s only job is to help people escape poverty, what do we do once we get them out? Abandon them?”

It is a fact that Opus Dei often sets up house close to universities where future leaders and professionals will be formed for the next generation. The founder believed professional prestige was a tool the Lord could use: you have to win the respect of your peers/colleagues before you can win their souls. That being said, the Ottawa chapter of Opus Dei has found no shortage of Catholics who want to excel at their profession and know their faith: I’ve met three doctors, a lawyer, a real estate developer, a software engineer, and a high-school teacher, among others. I don’t know how any of them were first drawn to Opus Dei, or if someone “asked them” to join. (As noted last time, I had to ask a lay member (supernumerary) how (and where) I could attend an Opus Dei evening). As a footnote, a look in the Ottawa phonebook under Opus Dei shows a “1-800” number to a Montreal Opus Dei “Information Centre” – not exactly aggressive or “Direct Marketing,” given that they have a centre named Parkhill in Ottawa.

On the negative side, however, a point I don’t like to make, but which I am told by an unbiased observer, is that an Opus Dei affiliated elementary school in Toronto (Northmount) sets its tuition at $11,500/yr. for students beyond grade 1 – which is more than double what Maryvale Academy charges in Ottawa. Still, for those who simply want to attend The Work’s monthly recollections, Opus Dei does not ask anything - it’s simply not like a fancy golf club with a hefty membership fee. In fact, I never heard any Opus Dei representative ask for a nickel over the twelve to fourteen month period I attended recollections. But obviously, many do give, which allows Opus Dei to cover not just its residence expenses but also enables members to establish apostolic outreaches in the form of youth centres, schools and hospitals, which are by no means aimed specifically at the “elite.” In Chicago’s inner city, for example, at “Midtown (Youth) Centre,” 75% of their graduates go to college – while only 15 percent of their inner city peer/neighbours do. If that’s elitism… sign me up. Sign up my whole family.

I thought that you might like to print the attached approved prayer for Pope John Paul II's intercession. Click on the link below.

http://www.ewtn.com/library/Prayer/intercesjp2.HTM

God Bless,
Dan

Opus Dei Must Be Doing Something Right

When I was at St. Augustine’s Seminary (89-94’) I first heard the name of “St. Josemaria Escriva” – founder of Opus Dei. A co-seminarian of mine was reading Escriva’s “The Way,” an orderly book of 1,000 little counsels the founder gave to his spiritual directees during its early years.

A couple of years later I found myself sitting in a crowded cafeteria of a Quebec retreat centre. With two free seats at my table, two members of a well-known religious order came by and asked to sit down. “Help yourself,” I said. After exchanging greetings, I mentioned that I was a member of a new religious community: the Companions of the Cross. The response of my guest(s) was unexpected: ”are you, like, with Vatican II or are you like ‘Opus Dei?’” I assured them: “no, we are with Vatican II,” and launched into a history of the community, which left the Opus Dei reference point in the background. But my guests certainly awakened my curiosity. Whoever this Opus Dei was, something told me they were probably doing something right to warrant such hostility.

A couple of years later, I befriended a young married couple who I discovered were actually lay members of Opus Dei (which I’ve since learned are called supernumeraries; there are also priests and lay celibates who are called numeraries). They were among the nicest people I’d ever met – and hip to boot. They were informed and very open, and definitely had an apostolic mindset. In fact, they were the first people I’d ever heard use the term “The Work” (the literal translation from the Latin word ‘Opus.’) I distinctly remember my friend (who had a license to teach Church History) seeming more open to teaching in a “secular” university setting than at the seminary – since he might reach a lot more who had been misinformed about the Church, or had never heard the true Gospel.

Since then I’ve met other members of Opus Dei – and have been left with the same favorable impression, with the exception of the odd member who is more serious than I’d like – but let’s face it, there are serious folks everywhere.

As for critics of “The Work,” I’ve met more than my share of them. Usually they are priests and nuns who have never sat down with an Opus Dei member, or read Escriva’s books, or attended any conferences Opus Dei supports. Their criticism is usually framed describing the organization as “secretive,” “elitist,” “anti-women,” and “into power.” Strong words, all of them, which has left me asking: “Why are people so angry with Opus Dei? They must be doing something right.” And so I decided I wanted to learn more about them.

Later that month, in November 2003, I received a mini – book for my birthday written by Escriva entitled “Furrow.” The odd thing is the donor knew nothing about my budding interest in Opus Dei – she was not a member, just a prayerful person. But her gift was a masterpiece. Reading it prompted me in the months that followed to ask a lay member of Opus Dei how I might attend one of their functions. His response surprised me: “You’ve never been asked?”1 I answered: “No.” Well, there are “evenings of recollection” every second Monday and Wednesday of the month for men at their centre near Ottawa U” (there are also separate evenings for women). And so I began attending, and finding these evenings exceptional – like a mini retreat. They were unlike the traditional charismatic prayer meetings - which are usually prefaced by a period of “Praise and Worship” before a time of prophecy and/or teaching. Rather, the evenings at Opus Dei consisted of three mini-teachings (two by a priest, one by a lay member) interspersed with periods of silence/prayer, along with an corporate “examination of conscience,” and an opportunity to go to confession. The whole evening takes about two and one half hours. To Be Continued

You Sex-Educator

I attended a workshop/lecture last night given by a lady named Dr. Liliana Trivelli. The subject of her talk was:

Parents’ Positive Influence
On their Child’s Developing Sexuality:
The Importance of Character Formation

Dr. Trivelli is a practicing physician in New York who has spoken at UN Conferences and around the world – and just happens to be a mother of nine (and grandmother). I’ll try and synthesize what she had to say, and then comment on some of the resistance I heard coming from “the floor.”

She started off by stating that there are now three main sources of sexual pressure facing teens, which didn’t exist 45 years ago.

1) Sex Education in schools.
2) Sex in the Media.
3) Peer Pressure.

What has been the consequence? STD’s (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) – an epidemic of STD’s. One person today can carry as many as six or seven STD’s – since there is so much sleeping around. Just one sexual encounter with a carrier of STD’s can leave a person sterile. And these STD’s can lie dormant for years. A young wife, for example, who was a virgin prior to marriage, contracted an STD through her husband – who had had only one sexual encounter (at a high school party) prior to marriage.

She also noted that there are two or three STD’s much more serious than AIDS in terms of their prevalence and harmful impact. One is Chlamydia; the other is called HPV (Human Papilloma Virus). These, say Trivelli, are the “best kept secrets” in the medical world. Secret in that there is no known cure for HPV, and Chlamydia, for its part, can cause sterility and repeated ectopic pregnancies – the latter being gravely serious, since the breaking of a fallopian tube associated with an ectopic pregnancy can cause a woman to bleed to death).

As for sex-ed, Dr. Alfred Kinsey’s 1950’s “sex-experiments” (which lacked any moral compass) were used as the basis for programs which were introduced almost universally in American schools in the early 70’s. As has been documented, Kinsey’s studies and the programs, which grew out of them, were completely divorced from the Catholic understanding of sex “belonging in the context of marriage for the dual purposes of “bonding the spouses, and pro-creating and educating children.” Fancy labels may have been given to these programs (Family Life, etc.) - but for the most part families were left out of it.

Many parents, according to Trivelli, are still left out of it. Parents who decide to “pull their kids out of sex-ed” are often bullied and ridiculed at PTA meetings as being “overly protective” and “ill-equipped” for this delicate task. In many schools textbooks are not “allowed out” of the classroom – leaving parents in the dark. It’s not just the textbooks. In England, for example, ten-year-old girls can receive the “morning after pill,” without their parent’s knowledge or consent.

But, she said, “You parents are still the primary educators of your children. You know them best and when it is best to “pass on” sexual knowledge – though many of you wrestle with the “how and when” questions (of passing on this knowledge). (The “how and when” – by the way - are the “top two” questions Mrs. T. receives as she gives lectures around the world).

For smaller children, she recommends first taking a “reading” of what the child might be ready for. This can be done by first answering their sex-related questions with a question:

eg. Little Johnny: “Mom, where do babies come from?”
Mom: “That’s a good question, what do you think, Johnny?”

In this way, you don’t pass on more information than your particular child is ready for. It’s also best, she stated, for Dads to “pass on” to sons, and Moms to daughters, or - for single parents – to find a good father or mother figure who knows the child well enough to pass on this delicate knowledge.

Mrs. T also mentioned that for shy adolescents/children, it’s often useful to use “triggering devices” such as TV news stories to “incidentally” raise the subject:

E.g. Mom: “That (teenage) girl has a baby and she’s not married. That’s too bad. I wonder how that happened?” (Remember this is a shy child she’s talking to).
Daughter: “How could she have a baby and not be married? …”
Now Mom can introduce the subject.

As for dating, Mrs. Trivelli recommended never allowing your child to date before 15 years of age. Her preference is that teens wait until they are finished high school.

Now if your son or daughter watches unmonitored TV, then the above conversation would seem laughable – since 80% of TV programs have sexual content, and 20% of TV shows have graphic sexual content.1 Still, even with home safeguards, it’s quite possible that your son or daughter will bring home a “guess what I heard on the bus today,” – in which case you must deal with the issue immediately and step-by-step.

No less important are the tools at parent’s disposal: teaching respect, responsibility and chastity. Kids need to respect you, and their own property, not just other people’s property. When your kids are small, don’t let them destroy their own toys. That is unacceptable. If they borrow library books and are late – let the fine come out of their allowance; don’t rescue them. It’s got to hurt for them to learn. As for fashion: Set limits for your girls. Ask them: How do you want boys to look at you?

Now as for condoms, Mrs. T might as well have called then con-dumbs, since they give false security. They don’t work. Even if used properly 100% of the time, there remains a 13% failure rate. In medicine, this is typically seen as a totally unacceptable rate of risk. Yet, to my surprise, a number of “in writing” questions came up from the floor at “half time” nuanced either explicitly or implicitly with the understanding that …chastity is unrealistic, so… why don’t you just tell us condoms are OK?” My observation about this “resistance” by a number of attendees tells me that a lot of serious Catholics – such as these who gave up their Friday night to attend – deep down don’t trust the Church’s message on condoms. I suspect many are afraid they’ll “lose their kids” if they are “too strong.” Mrs. T responded to the “unrealistic” question, however, by suggesting that kids want a black and white message. They don’t want to be told to be chaste but “carry a condom just in case.” In fact, a Catholic Youth worker who was giving this mixed message in New York City was blasted by the kids with, “Can we use them or not? Are they OK or Not? Is it Chastity or Condoms? In short, kids want to be told the truth - even if they resist at first.
On this message of clarity, Mrs. T also stated that it’s best to tell your daughter that you don’t want her to ever use a condom or the pill, while at the same time telling her that if it ever did happen that she should get pregnant, that you’d help her (she didn’t speak of the boy’s role but her “no condom” rule would no doubt apply). As for the pill, did you know that 50% of all women who have abortions were “on the pill?” Another “best kept secret” Dr. T passed on.

So, besides “clarity,” just what works in helping kids “buy” the chastity message? According to secular researchers:

1) 40% of kids say “Religion”
2) 17% say “STD’s”

According to Mrs. T, another “device” which works very well – especially with teen girls, is the “infidelity” message. Consider this example she cited from an actual classroom presentation on abstinence given to teen girls:

Mrs. T: “For most of you who are sexually active now, your future husband will be unfaithful to you.”

Girls: “No he won’t! No he won’t!”

Mrs. T: “Yes he will…and you will be unfaithful to him.”
(The girls all got silent at this point)

Mrs. T: You will have formed a pattern of “having sex whenever you want with whoever you want, of never denying yourselves…just because you have a marriage license, you won’t gain “sudden strength” to overcome your temptations (for other partners) later on. (Add mine: especially when sickness or money pressures or child-raising pressures or loneliness comes along)

Thank God for Grandma, uh, make that …Dr. Trivelli.

A Saint’s Last Will and Testament

I was reading 2nd Peter the other morning. 2 Peter 1 to be exact. Peter was preparing to tell his flock of his impending “departure” (i.e. death). The Lord had let him know there wasn’t much time left (2 Pt 1v14). Unlike Jesus, however, he didn’t tell his disciples on three separate occasions that he would have to “suffer much”. (Mk 8v31, 9v31, 10v33) Rather, he used the premonition of his coming departure as a springboard for serving up “reminders” to the flock - which he himself stated they already knew. This baffled me. Reminding them of stuff they already knew? That’s right. In so many ways, he was saying…

“Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
Blessed Are Ye Who Keep Pressing In,
And Not Falling Into A “Same Ol’ Same Ol” Attitude.”

I think an example will serve the point. Do you ever recall hearing a band that sounded “great” on record, but when they appeared “live” came off “flat?” I have, and I think this is the danger Peter is speaking of. A believer can “know their stuff,” and be out there “in public,” yet be serving – imperceptibly - with an attitude that lacks the spark necessary to infect others with a love of the Gospel and Church teaching. This was something Peter had to make his disciples aware of before he would “take off his tent.” He would be leaving them soon, and after his departure they would have to learn motivate themselves – to “push through” the desert moments:

“You will have to do your utmost yourselves, adding goodness to the faith that you have, understanding to your goodness, self-control to your understanding, patience to your self-control, true devotion to your patience, kindness toward your fellow men to your devotion, and to this kindness, love. If you have a generous supply of these, they will not leave you ineffectual or unproductive: they will bring you to a real knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But without them a man is blind or else shortsighted…work all the harder (therefore)…(for) in doing all these things there is no danger that you will ever fall away…and you will be granted admittance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.” (2Pt 1v5:10-11)

“That is why (gaining admittance to heaven) I am continually recalling the same truths to you, even though you already know them and firmly hold them.” (2Pt1v12)

Perhaps the memory of his own denials of our Lord pushed him to warn them – in a backhanded way - not to fall into the “I’m fit – I pay my dues” attitude. In any case, he knew that real, living faith comes through hearing the same message over and over again – which must be served up with a little different twist every time. This time the twist was serious: “I am leaving soon:

‘I am sure it is my duty, as long as I am in this tent, to keep stirring you up with reminders, since I know the time for taking off this tent is coming soon, as our Lord Jesus Christ foretold to me.” (2 Pt1v14)

Yes Peter, remind me. Remind me often.

Charlton Rowed The Boat Ashore

It’s Lent. A time of more sacrifice, …while keeping a joyful spirit. I think you know what I mean. If you’re a walking, talking, (kneeling?) believer, chances are you practice some form of penance throughout the year to keep you fit spiritually.

For my part, I received a little penitential “nudge-nudge” from the Holy Spirit a few Friday’s back. I was attending a concert given by what was billed as “The World Youth Day Choir”. The concert was excellent, but the Lord seemed to have other plans for me being there as well. It began in the form of a tap on the shoulder.

The tapper turned out to be a priest I once studied with at St. Augustine’s Seminary. He was now heavily into “further studies”. I threw in my own war story by stating that my life had also “sped up” a lot – that I was taking a couple of night courses as well as keeping the (financial) books in order at my home parish – which although demanding, left a little time each weekend for the recreation I enjoy: a bit of cross-country skiing and / or playing guitar. I added that “I’ve come to accept that the schooling part of my life is not an end in itself – it would be nice to get A’s in everything, but if good marks come at the expense of causing my “paid work to suffer, or to have zero recreation time, (let alone prayer time!) then it’s not worth it”.

For his part, my friend - who also likes cross-country skiing - stated he had “not been out all season”. This startled me somewhat. In the same vein a sporty mom of five kids sitting next to me at the concert also said she loved “cross-country skiing”, but that she “hadn’t been able to go for quite a while”. Was this a coincidence? I think not. The Lord seemed to be sandwiching me between them to remind me not to complain about my “workload”… and to realize that I had more than a little room to shoulder whatever He might send as His custom fitting “Penancizer” to top up my self-directed “Less is More” program for Lent.

The Penancizer arrived just in time – four days later. After a few days of working with it I felt like Charlton Heston chained to the oar in the battleship scene of Ben Hur. It took its toll on me, but eventually the”oar” became unchained – my energy spent - and I found myself sleeping on my Lazyboy on a Sunday afternoon: Transfiguration Sunday – and believe me it was. Although spent, I felt “free.” The next day, as I sat down to my desk at work, I discovered a beautiful travelogue of an extensive trip through China an office neighbour had taken. It meant a lot because China is a place I’d love to visit. To me, it was the Lord’s way of saying, “let’s get away to a quiet place and rest awhile.” Indeed, “Let’s”.

Interesting Poem on Confession by Toronto Priest / Poet Laureate

Greetings Friends: Click on the link below for an interesting poem on confession by a priest I used to know while at St. Augustine's Seminary in Toronto. He was a character back then - a very articulate character.

MORE THAN COINCIDENCE

A couple of weeks back I began a couple of night courses in accounting at Algonquin. The first course, Accounting 2302, is appropriately named. It deals with plusses and minuses and that suits me fine. The second course, Business Computer Applications, is not so appropriately named. It should be titled, instead “Virtual Lent,” or at least I thought so until the third week rolled around.

The problem with the course, of course, is that it requires us students use “personal” computers, and “personal” they can be: stubborn, uncooperative, fussy, temperamental, etc. In my case, I was required to “introduce” one “MR.SAM” (Instructional Software) to my “personal” computer, who I will identify as “MISS.SUE.” To my chagrin, “MR.SAM” and “MISS.SUE” did not hit it off. Even after forking out $100 dollars to get MR.SAM and introduce him to her, she would not talk to him. So I ended up getting mad at MISS.SUE, and telling her how she disappointed me. Alas, she would not listen. The next week at class, the instructor suggested I introduce a third party: one “Mr. XP,” to MISS.SUE.

Now Mr. XP, I discovered, was a “professional” companion and would offer his services for no less than $150. My instructor convinced me, however, that Mr. XP was known as quite the matchmaker among computer “personali-ties.” So I heeded his counsel and made arrangements for Mr. XP to “drop by.” But my pouting MISS.SUE was not impressed – she wouldn’t talk to him either. This left me all out of sorts. In desperation, I called a surgeon I knew who once treated MISS.SUE. The surgeon suggested that the problem might be MISS.SUE’S lodger – her quiet but stubborn relative AUNTY.VIRUS. On a whim, we decided to act. AUNTY.VIRUS HAD TO GO. For her turn, she pleaded with tears: “ARE YOU SURE? ARE YOU SURE?” With eyes lowered, we had to mumble, “yes, AUNTY, WE…ARE SURE.” To everyone’s surprise, the absence of AUNTY changed the atmosphere completely. Suddenly MISS.SUE was less reserved. She even invited Mr. XP in, and recognizing he was a decent sort, even gave him a key and rented him the room upstairs. But within a short time, Mr. XP began to show his persuasive manner, and convinced MISS.SUE – can you believe it - to take in as lodger his very own “AUNTY.VIRUS?” No word of a lie! After all, he said, “These are perilous times. You can’t be too cautious.” And so it happened that Mr. XP’s own AUNTY.VIRUS joined the household. She was friendly enough, but soon afterward it was discovered she was rather peculiar in her ways too, for when MR.SAM was brought around (by our professional friend, “Mr. XP”) to see MISS.SUE again, sometimes AUNTY let him in, and sometimes not. MR.SAM, you see, never came alone. He always had one of two DRIVERS in tow, since he could not drive himself. One of the DRIVERS the NEW AUNTY liked and welcomed into the house, but the other, she did not like, and so did not welcome into the house. Nor would she allow her nephew Mr. XP to convince her that this SECOND DRIVER would make a suitable chaperone for MR.SAM and young MISS.SUE - who she was growing increasingly fond of.

In the end, after all the “carryin’ on” between MR.SAM AND MISS.SUE AND THE OTHERS, I ended up two weeks behind in my computer course – or so it seemed. Too my surprise, after losing much peace (cursing the computer; damning the software manufacturers, …going to confession…) I ended up getting an exemption after taking the “Evaluation Exam” – which actually meant I was now “a week ahead.” This suits me fine, since my “paid work” has a growing pile of chores, which remain unattended. Maybe it’s just a coincidence, but most of this happened…just before the election – reminding me of something a Madonna House priest used to say “You’re going through a hard time…because the Lord needs it.”